The Shriek: A Satirical BurlesqueSomerville, Charles
General
The Shriek: A Satirical Burlesque
Somerville, Charles
Hull, E. M. (Edith Maude). Sheik -- Parodies, imitations, etc.; Satire
One could read a symbol in its curling smoke of the fiery spirit yet
existent in the lithe, young, prone, boyish body as well as the
indubitable indication of an unbreakable habit.
But there was so little time for reading anything, although it must be
admitted that the light was excellent for even an Edison cannot vie
with that real thing which you get on the Sahara.
But to get back to Verbeena. And high time too!
For the big, brown devil had her! Right in his arms. Across his
horse! And wrapped up in his great, long white cloak. Not any too
white either.
She--already she was beginning to feel she was she--Verbeena
Mayonnaise, was caught, trapped, trussed up in the folds of that white
cloak of his, utterly helpless and like a week's wash!
It was horrible, awful, terrible and very uncomfortable.
Moreover, the humiliation of it was meticulously genuine.
And what could she do? Jiu jitsu she had but it wasn't worth a jitney
to a person in a cocoon! By the same token all her gymnasium and other
athletic perfections which had trained her fit to give Georges
Carpentier or Jacques Dempsey a stiff battle now went blah.
Additionally, this big heap Arab chief that had snared her she
knew--thrillingly knew--was hefty.
He was managing his fiery steed one-handed, beautifully, better than
any stableyard virtuoso she had ever known at 'ome.
His other arm about her was like a hoop of steel.
Or a lobster's claw.
She felt pinched. And, in truth, she was. She was in the hands of the
Shereef.
She tried to scream. But when she did so she only succeeded in eating
a section of his flowing white robe.
She tried to think. But she might as well have been her brother,
Tawdry.
She tried to smoke. And that was worst of all. Her arms were so
encumbered she couldn't get at any of her cigarette cases.
Not that she was left entirely without tobacco. The Sahara
lady-snatcher's garments rang with the odor of it.
To add to her agony, her snippy little nose smarted keenly and she
knew it must be red as a beet from sunburn. And she was helpless to
get out her powder puff.
Despite her manly training, the powder-puff habit was one which she
had always practiced in common with all the other Cambridge girls and
fellows.
Cumulatively upon these conditions of despair, she began to wonder
what the deuce this bally coot meant to do with her!
One thing certain was that he was seriously, perhaps permanently
upsetting her scheme, her plan, her idea for junketing forth by her
lonely into the desert. Such a perfectly good plan! One that would
forever end her being dependent on Lord Tawdry's luck at bridge and
forever relieve her of the necessity of getting Americans at the
foreign hotels to stake her at games of stud poker.
Ah--it had been no idle journey--no mere whimsy! It had been designed
to bring her wealth, fame, and a glory the most transcendent of her
times.
The marriage of Mary Pickford and Douglas Fairbanks had suggested it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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