The Southern Literary Messenger, Vol. II., No. 8, July, 1836Various
General
The Southern Literary Messenger, Vol. II., No. 8, July, 1836
Various
American literature -- 19th century -- Periodicals
Of all the evils which harass the human family, none is perhaps more
tormenting or more difficult to be removed, than bashfulness—a feeling
sufficient in itself to blast the most promising hopes, and render
comparatively useless the most brilliant abilities. To this evil, from
earliest recollection, I have been painfully subject, and to its
influence upon my character and habits, may be traced the many
difficulties I have met with in my passage through life. Gifted by
nature with a mind of no ordinary caste, which my modest and retiring
disposition, while it precluded me from the enjoyment of society,
induced me to cultivate, at an early age I had acquired a large fund
of useful and polite information. This circumstance induced my parents
to send me to the University of ——, then the most flourishing
institution in the country. The first term after my arrival passed off
drearily enough, but after becoming familiarized to the habits of my
fellow students, and to the customs of the institution, I became
better satisfied with my situation. Nothing of importance occurred
until the time appointed for the examinations came on. I had applied
myself with assiduity and vigilance, and flattered myself that I had
completely mastered the exercises appointed for the occasion. Among
the candidates for graduation there was an individual whom I shall
designate by the name of C——, and whose connection with my narration
compels me to mention him. He was the son of a southern planter, of
immense fortune, and to a person of almost faultless beauty united
great liberality, which his princely fortune enabled him to stretch to
its farthest limits. As may be imagined he was quite a lion among the
students and ladies.
Towards this individual I conceived a certain feeling of dislike from
my first introduction, which a more intimate acquaintance with his
character ripened into hatred. He was proud and overbearing in his
deportment towards his inferiors, and even amidst his immediate
friends and acquaintance he possessed a certain haughty and imperious
bearing, indicative of the exalted opinion he entertained respecting
his own merits. His mind was not remarkable for strength, nevertheless
he had some shrewdness or cunning, which the vulgar are apt to mistake
for talents. As I have before observed, the time for the annual
examination had arrived, and no culprit in the gloomy walls of Newgate
dreaded the fatal toll of St. Sepulchre's bell—the gloomy herald of
many a sinner's entrance into eternity—more than I did the arrival of
the hour when our exercises were to commence. A large number of ladies
and gentlemen had been invited, and among the number was my father.
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