{Kate.} Dear old Eric! _(kneeling)_ {Eric.} My darling wife! {Kate.} Hush! you noisy fellow. Whisper it, there's a good boy, now. _(she bends her head, he whispers)_ {Eric.} _(softly)_ Wife! {Kate.} _(takes her wedding ring from her purse, and gives it to him)_ Place my ring upon my finger, Eric, for a moment. _(He slips the ring on her finger and kisses her hand. Pressing the ring to her lips)_ I have so much in my heart to tell you. Oh, husband, storm-clouds, storm-clouds! {Eric.} Let them break, Kate. Love is a good substantial umbrella. {Kate.} A gingham, dear, a gingham. They are talking in Market-Sinfield about me. {Eric.} I envy them their topic. {Kate.} I can't bear it, Eric. What shall I do? {Eric.} The yokels mustn't see me here so frequently, that's all. {Kate.} _(rises)_ To stop their tongues and break my heart. Eric, turn your back to me, I've something to say to you. _(they sit back to back)_ {Eric.} Fire away, darling. {Kate.} Eric, when we two were wed a year ago our compact was that our marriage should never become known during your mother's lifetime. {Eric.} That's it, wifie. {Kate.} Because your pride would never allow you to share my means. {Eric.} Very true, Kate. {Kate.} Now, Eric, doesn't it strike you that you were in the wrong? {Eric.} No. {Kate.} Because if a man will take from a woman something so precious as her love, surely he may share with her anything so paltry as her money. _(Eric turns to embrace her)_ {Eric.} My darling. {Kate.} _(looking round)_ Don't, Eric. I shall have to go indoors if you behave badly. {Eric.} My dear Kate, there is another point of view which presents itself to the prudent husband. {Kate.} What's that? {Eric.} How much does Priors Mesne bring you in? {Kate.} Oh, dear, I'm afraid to tell you! {Eric.} Ah! {Kate.} It's not my fault. I've done everything I could. {Eric.} Well, then, Kate, my pay and my mother's allowance tot up to three hundred and fifty a year, and, my darling, I'm in debt. {Kate.} _(turning and seizing him by the shoulder)_ Oh, Eric, how can you! {Eric.} _(laughingly)_ Don't, dear, I shall have to go home if you behave badly. {Kate.} Why, Eric, some of my farmhands flourish with families on eighteen shillings a week. {Eric.} Yes, darling, there are animals who live on flesh and fruit, and there are animals who subsist on nuts. If I were a beast I could not look at a nut. {Kate.} If you tried very hard, Eric, do you think you could write? {Eric.} I've been taught, dear. {Kate.} No, no, I mean in journals and magazines.