The Squire: An Original Comedy in Three ActsPinero, Arthur Wing
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The Squire: An Original Comedy in Three Acts
Pinero, Arthur Wing
Comedy plays; English drama -- 19th century
{S. P.} Quite so. _(he comes down L., C.)_ Hem!
The editor of the "Pagley Mercury and Market-
Sinfield Herald," with which are incorporated the
"Inn-Keeper's Manual" and the "Agriculturists'
Guide," presents his compliments to Squire Verity,
and, regarding the ever-spreading influence of modern
journalism, requests that I, its representative,
may be permitted to be present at Squire Verity's
Harvest Feast to-morrow evening. _(Kate laughs
heartily. The S. P. looks round at Rob. to ascertain
the cause of her amusement)_ Journalism is as a tree,
its root is embedded in our constitution, while its
branches--
{Kate.} All right; you can come.
{S. P.} _(raising his arms)_ While its branches--
{Kate.} All right; you can come.
{S. P.} _(hurt)_ Thank you.
{Kate.} Would you--_(noticing his face)_ Oh dear
{S. P.} I beg pardon.
{Kate.} Would you--would you like anything to
drink?
{S. P.} _(quickly)_ Yes.
{Kate.} Christie!
{Gil.} Christie!
{Kate.} _(sorrowfully)_ Are you quite sure?
{S. P.} Positive, _(sits R., of table)_
_(Chris, appears at door L.)_
{Kate.} Christie! _(emphatically)_ Milk!
{S. P.} Er--I should prefer ale. _(rises quickly)_
{Chris.} The old cask has run out, and the new
one isn't to be tapped till to-morrow.
{S. P.} I don't think I really need anything. I'm
very moderate. Thank you. Good day!
_(Robjohns puts mug on form, rises and goes up
stage wiping mouth.)_
_(Shabby Person hurries off through archway;
Kate laughs.)_
{Kate.} Good-bye, Master Robjohns!
{Rob.} _(turning round, up stage)_ Father's respects,
and he has always heretofore cut up the ducks at
the harvest feast.
{Kate.} Well?
{Rob.} Father's mortally fond of duck, but he
always cut 'em up fairly and friendly.
{Kate.} Yes?
{Rob.} My best respects to you, Squire, and as I
come, in place of father, I hope you'll make no
difference. Good day to ye, Squire.
_(He goes off through archway. Kate rises, goes
up C., and down L., C.)_
{Kate.} Thank you, Gilbert, for thinking so much
of to-morrow.
{Gil.} _(looking at her earnestly)_ Don't name it,
Squire.
{Kate.} _(awkwardly)_ The summer's over--the
winds are getting quite cold--good afternoon, Gilbert.
_(Kate takes shawl off stone and goes towards steps,
where Gilbert intercepts her.)_
{Gil.} Squire!
{Kate.} Yes?
{Gil.} Will you listen to me?
{Kate.} _(L. C.)_ Business?
{Gil.} _(R. of her)_ The business of my life.
{Kate.} Oh, Gilbert! Again? _(sits)_
{Gil.} _(puts gun down R., of archway)_ Squire--
Squire Kate, I--I can't take "no" for an answer.
{Kate.} Are you a strong man or a weak one?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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