When he had said these last words, the vicar turned right round and
walked away, for his eyes were full; and I am glad to say that Janet too
saw his back, as for the first time he turned it upon her, through a
tear. It was an old back, in a somewhat rusty black coat, and with
stooping shoulders, and there was a slight quiver of emotion in it as he
turned away. Poor child! poor little thing, setting out upon that world
which is so cruel, which makes so small account of soft things and
little things like a bit of a girl, carrying them away upon its stream,
drifting them into corners, taking all the courage and the happiness out
of them. “God bless her! God help her!” the vicar said within himself as
he hurried away.
Janet had been deposited in a first-class carriage alone, with all her
little properties carefully arranged about her. Henceforward probably
she would have to travel by second or even third-class; but Mr. Bland
had got her ticket for this last occasion regardless of expense, and had
fee’d the guard to take care of her, and done everything for her as if
she had been a princess. And I am happy to state that for the first mile
or two Janet saw the familiar landscape all dilated and out of drawing
through the medium of tears. They were not many, nor were they bitter,
but at least they were genuine.
“Poor old vicar,” she said to herself; “poor Mrs. Bland; poor Aunt
Mary----”
Even at that moment it was not herself she pitied, but those whom she
left behind. She added at the end of a minute,
“Poor old doctor,” and burst into a laugh: and her heart jumped up again
after its momentary sympathetic depression, and the tears dried of
themselves. Her heart jumped up with a throb almost of exultation. At
last she had fairly escaped--got away from the village and all the
enveloping kindness and cares that had been lavished upon her.
Janet was not ungrateful any more than youth in the abstract is
ungrateful, but the first sensation of freedom had something
intoxicating in it! Setting out to face the world! She had been told
all her life that she would have to do it some day; and though that
eventuality had always been held before her as a dreadful though
inevitable prospect, it had lost all its terrors as contrasted with the
monotony of the village life, which she knew by heart, and all the quiet
evenings and dull days in which Janet had often felt as if her young
activity and energy of mind must burst the very walls of the dainty
decorous cottage where it was so happy for her, so fortunate to have
found a home. How often had she felt there as if she would like to take
hold of the posts as Samson did, and shake it till it toppled down about
her ears, not with any ill meaning, but for sheer need of movement,
mischief, something to happen. To face the world! She looked it in the
face with a smile of triumph and delight, as a sea-boy faces the smiling
ocean that is in time to be his grave, as it had been his father’s
before him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account