The interloper was established between Kingston and Gundred, and the
purely formal nature of their marriage might have been clear even
to themselves. They fell apart without wrench or difficulty, and on
Gundred a heavy sense of loneliness settled like a cloud. She it was
that suffered most from the separation, for she had not her husband’s
compensations. All these years she had lived in the happiness of what
she believed to be perfect intimacy with Kingston, sharing his hopes,
his wishes, his thoughts; now, in a flash, she was made to guess
that she had merely shared the outer aspects of his life, that the
fancied beautiful completeness of their union was merely the band of
tolerance strengthened through the long years by custom. Now that the
elasticity of the tie that bound them was put to too great a stretch,
it flew asunder, and, in the rebound, struck Gundred a stinging blow.
It was not, of course, to be expected of her that she should realize
the situation clearly, or face the true state of the case with any
perspicacious candour. All she felt was felt dimly, instinctively,
half-consciously; not even to herself would she admit what she felt, or
analyze the solitude that seemed gathering round her. But very vaguely,
in the introduction of Ivor Restormel, she understood that she herself
must somehow have failed--could not be quite all to her husband that
she had imagined herself, must at some point have fallen short of the
perfect wife’s proper performance. This uncomfortable perception,
which caught her in her tenderest spot, she made haste to burke and
bury in the depths of her consciousness. But its ghost occasionally
walked; and, though she did the best for herself by insisting daily
on her husband’s unjustifiable cruelty and the blackness of the
influences that had seduced him, yet she could never wholly escape
that faint instinct of failure which was the one thing that her
efficiency-worshipping nature most passionately dreaded.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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