British -- France -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Riviera (France) -- Fiction; Spouses -- Fiction
But others were worse off than she. So much so that she was even
moved to offer her own hard-won chair to a pretty, slender French
girl, pale and tired-looking, who kept leaning against anything that
came in her way till she seemed to become chilled to the bone, when
she would move a little and come back to the best place she could
find. Presently she leant against an iron balk close to an inviting
deck-lounge, which was occupied the whole way across by a hard round
hat, a man's fur coat, and some walking-sticks and umbrellas.
Ermengarde longed to send these properties flying--especially the
hat, which inspired her with peculiarly acute hatred--and lay the
pretty, tired French girl upon the comfortable lounge, if only till
the owner of the hard hat came to claim it, which he never did, till
they went ashore. Had she been certain of her ability to keep her
feet, Ermengarde would certainly have yielded her own chair to the
girl, and annexed to her own use that sequestrated by the owner of
the detestable hat; it would have been such a pleasure to kick and
stamp on that hat and hear it boom like a drum, and pop like a burst
motor-tyre. But she was by no means certain of her ability to do
anything but shiver.
An eternity of shivers and qualms seemed to pass before the spires of
Calais appeared between gaps made in groups pacing the deck, an
eternity mitigated by the thought that every shiver brought one
nearer to the artistically decorated, electric warmed and lighted,
flying boudoir, with its voluptuous sofa, etc., in the rightly named
_Train de Luxe_--the very sound of which diffused an atmosphere of
comfort and peace.
And now at last all fear of the dread penalty of the inexorable sea
was at an end, and Ermengarde rose to her feet in the proud
consciousness of being able to stand, and even walk, without sudden
subsidences to the deck or into the unwilling embraces of indignant
fellow-voyagers. Helped by a sailor, who unexpectedly appeared at
her side as if from the clouds, and was easily persuaded to carry her
things, she got down to the level of the landing-place, and enjoyed
the first thrill of foreign parts at the sight of blue-cloaked men in
uniform, short and solid, with bristling moustache and complacent
strut. How good it is, the first sight of these dear, delightful
creatures, who never seem to have anything to do but enjoy dignified
and ornamental leisure for the benefit of admiring mankind! And how
good, Ermengarde thought, to see a gangway shot into a crowd of
laughing, gesticulating, blue-bloused porters--to see them hurl
themselves upon the gangway tumultuously, one over the other, in a
solid mass, with shouts, songs, and exclamations, and so board the
vessel, leaping and laughing, and, falling upon passenger after
passenger, tear their precious misnamed hand-baggage from them, strap
it across their own shoulders, and, deaf to all entreaties, fight
their way back to the gangway, leap ashore, and fly from sight.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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