I mentioned a disappointment which the sister of my Julia had sustained:
it was just before I left England. While on a visit at Abergavenny, she
became acquainted with a young gentleman of fortune, who, after taking
some pains to render himself agreeable, had the satisfaction of gaining
the affections of one of the most amiable girls in the world. She is all
that a woman can be, except being my Julia. Louisa was at that time
extremely attached to a lady in the same house with her, who was by no
means a favourite with her lover. They used frequently to have little
arguments concerning her. He would not allow her any merit. Louisa
fancied she saw her own image reflected in the bosom of her friend. She
is warm in her attachments. Her zeal for her friend at last awakened a
curiosity in her lover, to view her with more scrutiny. He had been
accustomed to pay an implicit obedience to Louisa's opinion; he fancied
he was still acquiescing only in that opinion when he began to discover
she was handsome, and to find some farther beauties which Louisa had not
painted in so favourable a light as he now saw them. In short, what at
first was only a compliment to his mistress, now seemed the due of the
other. He thought Louisa had hardly done her justice; and in seeking to
repair that fault, he injured the woman who doated on him. Love, which
in some cases is blind, is in others extremely quick-sighted. Louisa saw
a change in his behaviour--a studied civility--an apprehension of not
appearing sufficiently assiduous--frequent expressions of fearing to
offend--and all those mean arts and subterfuges which a man uses, who
wants to put in a woman's power to break with him, that he may basely
shelter himself behind, what he styles, her cruelty. Wounded to the soul
with the duplicity of his conduct, she, one day, insisted on knowing the
motives which induced him to act in so disingenuous a manner by her. At
first his answers were evasive; but she peremptorily urged an explicit
satisfaction. She told him, the most unfavourable certainty would be
happiness to what she now felt, and that _certainty_ she now called on
him in justice to grant her. He then began by palliating the fatal
inconstancy of his affections, by the encomiums which she had bestowed
on her friend; that his love for her had induced him to love those dear
to her; and some unhappy circumstances had arisen, which had bound him
to her friend, beyond his power or inclination to break through. This
disappointment, in so early a part of Louisa's life, has given a
tenderness to her whole frame, which is of advantage to most women, and
her in particular. She has, I question not, long since beheld this
unworthy wretch in the light he truly deserved; yet, no doubt, it was
not till she had suffered many pangs. The heart will not recover its
usual tone in a short time, that has long been racked with the agonies
of love; and even when we fancy ourselves quite recovered, there is an
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