confinement, or any other ill; but that it was an aggravation to my
sufferings (which to sustain was very difficult) to find her zeal for
me had drawn on her the ill-usage of her father. I further requested,
she would never again mention me to him; and if possible, never think of
me if those thoughts were productive of the least disquiet to her. I
likewise mentioned my hearing an act of grace would soon release me from
my bonds; and then I was determined to offer myself a volunteer in the
service, where, perhaps, I might find a cannon-ball my best friend.
A life, so different to what I had been used, brought on a disorder,
which the agitation of my spirits increased so much as to reduce me
almost to the gates of death. An old female servant of Miss Maynard's
paid me a visit, bringing me some little nutritive delicacies, which her
kind mistress thought would be serviceable to me. Shocked at the
deplorable spectacle I made, for I began to neglect my appearance; which
a man is too apt to do when not at peace with himself: shocked, I say,
she represented me in such a light to her lady, as filled her gentle
soul with the utmost terror for my safety. Guided alone by the
partiality she honoured me with, she formed the resolution of coming to
see me. She however gave me half an hour's notice of her intention. I
employed the intermediate time in putting myself into a condition of
receiving her with more decency. The little exertion I made had nearly
exhausted my remaining strength, and I was more dead than alive, when
the trembling, pale, and tottering guest made her approach in the house
of woe. We could neither of us speak for some time. The benevolence of
her heart had supported her during her journey thither; but now the
native modesty of her sex seemed to point out the impropriety of
visiting a man, unsolicited, in prison. Weak as I was, I saw the
necessity of encouraging the drooping spirits of my fair visitor. I
paid her my grateful acknowledgments for her inestimable goodness. She
begged me to be silent on that head, as it brought reflections she could
ill support. In obedience to her, I gave the conversation another turn;
but still I could not help reverting to the old subject. She then
stopped me, by asking, "what was there so extraordinary in her conduct?
and whether, in her situation, would not I have done as much for her?"
"Oh! yes!" I cried, with eagerness, "that I should, and ten times more."
I instantly felt the impropriety of my speech. "Then I have been
strangely deficient," said she, looking at me with a gentle smile. "I
ask a thousand pardons," said I, "for the abruptness of my expression. I
meant to evince my value for you, and my sense of what I thought you
deserved. You must excuse my method, I have been long unused to the
association of human beings, at least such as resemble you. You have
already conferred more favours than I could merit at your hands." Miss
Maynard seemed disconcerted--she looked grave. "It is a sign you think
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