The man for whom the hour of misfortune has sounded is caught up by
an invisible whirlwind, and for years back have these powers been
combining the innumerable incidents that must bring him to the
necessary moment, to the exact spot where tears lie in wait for him.
Remember all your efforts, all your presentiments, all the unavailing
offers of help. Remember, too, the kindly circumstances that pitied
you, and tried to bar your passage, but you thrust them aside like so
many importunate beggars. And yet were they humble, timid sisters, who
desired but to save you, and they went away without saying a word, too
weak and too helpless to struggle against decided things—where decided
it is known to God alone....
Scarcely has the disaster befallen us than we have the strange
sensation of having obeyed an eternal law; and, in the midst of the
greatest sorrow, there is I know not what mysterious comfort that
rewards us for our obedience. Never do we belong more completely to
ourselves than on the morrow of an irreparable catastrophe. It seems,
then, as though we had found ourselves again, as though we had won
back a part of ourselves that was necessary and unknown. A curious
calm steals over us. For days past, almost without our knowledge,
notwithstanding that we were able to smile at faces and flowers, the
rebel forces of our soul had been waging terrible battle on the borders
of the abyss, and now that we are at the depths of it, all breathes
freely.
Even thus, without respite, do these rebel forces struggle in the
soul of every one of us; and there are times when we may see the
shadow of these combats wherein our soul may not intervene, but we
pay no heed, for to all save the unimportant do we shut our eyes. At
a time when my friends are about me it may happen that, in the midst
of talk and shouts of laughter, there shall suddenly steal over the
face of one of them something that is not of this world. A motiveless
silence shall instantly prevail, and for a second’s space all shall be
unconsciously looking forth with the eyes of the soul. Whereupon, the
words and smiles, that had disappeared like frightened frogs in a lake,
will again mount to the surface, more violent than before. But the
invisible, here as everywhere, has gathered its tribute. Something has
understood that a fight was over, that a star was rising or falling and
that a destiny had just been decided....
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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