Great Britain -- Social conditions -- 19th century; London (England) -- Description and travel
A better experience, but also of the Morgue kind, in which chance happily
made me useful in a slight degree, arose to my remembrance as I took my
way by the Boulevard de Sébastopol to the brighter scenes of Paris.
The thing happened, say five-and-twenty years ago. I was a modest young
uncommercial then, and timid and inexperienced. Many suns and winds have
browned me in the line, but those were my pale days. Having newly taken
the lease of a house in a certain distinguished metropolitan parish—a
house which then appeared to me to be a frightfully first-class Family
Mansion, involving awful responsibilities—I became the prey of a Beadle.
I think the Beadle must have seen me going in or coming out, and must
have observed that I tottered under the weight of my grandeur. Or he may
have been in hiding under straw when I bought my first horse (in the
desirable stable-yard attached to the first-class Family Mansion), and
when the vendor remarked to me, in an original manner, on bringing him
for approval, taking his cloth off and smacking him, ‘There, Sir!
_There’s_ a Orse!’ And when I said gallantly, ‘How much do you want for
him?’ and when the vendor said, ‘No more than sixty guineas, from you,’
and when I said smartly, ‘Why not more than sixty from _me_?’ And when
he said crushingly, ‘Because upon my soul and body he’d be considered
cheap at seventy, by one who understood the subject—but you don’t.’—I
say, the Beadle may have been in hiding under straw, when this disgrace
befell me, or he may have noted that I was too raw and young an Atlas to
carry the first-class Family Mansion in a knowing manner. Be this as it
may, the Beadle did what Melancholy did to the youth in Gray’s Elegy—he
marked me for his own. And the way in which the Beadle did it, was this:
he summoned me as a Juryman on his Coroner’s Inquests.
In my first feverish alarm I repaired ‘for safety and for succour’—like
those sagacious Northern shepherds who, having had no previous reason
whatever to believe in young Norval, very prudently did not originate the
hazardous idea of believing in him—to a deep householder. This profound
man informed me that the Beadle counted on my buying him off; on my
bribing him not to summon me; and that if I would attend an Inquest with
a cheerful countenance, and profess alacrity in that branch of my
country’s service, the Beadle would be disheartened, and would give up
the game.
I roused my energies, and the next time the wily Beadle summoned me, I
went. The Beadle was the blankest Beadle I have ever looked on when I
answered to my name; and his discomfiture gave me courage to go through
with it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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