The Water Goats, and Other TroublesButler, Ellis Parker
General
The Water Goats, and Other Troubles
Butler, Ellis Parker
Fiction; Humorous stories; Short stories, American
“Mebby not,” said Fagan angrily. “Mebby I do not know how t' start th'
water goat, Toole! Mebby there is one way unbeknownst t' me. If so, I
have not tried it. But th' forty-sivin other ways I have tried, an' th'
goats will not swim. I have started thim backwards an' I have started
thim frontwards, an' I have took thim in by th' horns an' give thim
lessons t' swim, an' they will not swim! I have done me duty by thim,
Mike, an' I have wrastled with thim, an' rolled in th' lake with thim.
Was it t' be swimmin' teacher t' water goats ye got me this job for?”
“Hist!” said Toole again. “Not so loud, Tim! Ye haven't told Dugan have
ye?”
“I have not!” said Tim, with anger. “I have not told annybody annything
excipt thim goats an' what I told thim is not dacint hearin'. I have
conversed with thim in strong language, an' it done no good. No swimmin'
for thim! Come on down an' have a chat with thim yersilf, Toole. Come
on down an' argue with thim, an persuade thim with th' soft sound of yer
voice t' swim. Come on down an' git thim water goats used t' th' water.”
“Ye don't understand th' water goat, Tim,” said Toole in gentle reproof.
“I will show ye how t' handle him,” and he went out, followed by the wet
Keeper of the Water Goats.
The two water goats stood at the side of the lake, wet and mournful,
tied to two strong stakes. They looked weary and meek, for they had had
a hard morning, but as soon as they saw Tim Fagan they brightened up.
They arose simultaneously on their hind legs and their eyes glittered
with deadly hatred. They strained at their ropes, and then, suddenly,
panic-stricken, they turned and ran, bringing up at the ends of their
ropes with a shock that bent the stout stakes to which they were
fastened. They stood still and cowered, trembling.
“Lay hold!” commanded Toole. “Lay hold of a horn of th' brute till I
show ye how t' make him swim.”
Through the fresh gravel of the beach the four feet of the reluctant
goat ploughed deep furrows. It shook its head from side to side, but
Toole and Fagan held it fast, and into the water it went.
“Now!” cried Alderman Toole. “Git behind an' push, Tim! Wan! Two! Three!
Push!”
Alderman Toole released his hold and Keeper of the Water Goats Fagan
pushed. Then they tried the other goat. It was easier to try the other
water goat than to waste time hunting up the one they had just tried,
for it had gone away. As soon as Alderman Toole let it go, it went. It
seemed to want to get to the other end of the park as soon as possible,
but it did not take the short cut across the lake--it went around. But
it did not mind travel--it went to the farthest part of the park, and it
would have gone farther if it could. So Alderman Toole and Keeper Fagan
tried the other water goat. That one went straight to the other end of
the park. It swerved from a straight line but once, and that was when
it shied at a pail of water that was in the way. It did not seem to like
water.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account