Many a night—like many another girl!—Dosia sat in the window of her
shelving attic room, bathed in the golden moonlight, with her hair
falling on her shoulders and her hands clasped before her, a picture for
none to see. The warm summer odors of pine and hickory were around her.
The tide of youth was so strong in her heart! In vain she tried to stem
it. She longed inexpressibly for that outer world, of which she had
read, where youth was a power. In an age of modern young womanhood,
clever, self-satisfying, potential, Dosia belonged to the old régime
where sentiment still holds sway. She wanted, indeed, to learn more
about many things,—she longed to study music,—but she felt no
inspiration and no desire for the life of an artist; she was, in fact,
just a girl, who longed with vague indefiniteness, yet none the less
intensely, for the joyous life of a girl; the pleasure of being sought,
the excitement of shining, for music and dancing and little daily
delights, and—love. She dimly discerned unknown glories that made her
breath come quickly. Dosia dreamed of some one in the far future who
would be very good and very noble, whose love would hold her to
everything that was beautiful and right, with whom she would prove
herself extraordinarily witty and brilliant and fascinating, and whose
hand on hers would set her heart beating. She imagined pouring out her
heart to him,—that heart which seemed to be forever shut in her breast
now, with none to understand it, none to care,—going to him with all
these doubts and self-convictions and hopes, and feeling the blessedness
of his response. “You darling,” he would say, “don’t you know I was
loving you all the time? We neither of us knew each other, to be sure,
but the love was there all the same; it had existed since the beginning
of the world.”
She began to show the effects of that terrible atrophy which affects not
only the mind but the very blood of girlhood, and which does not need
iron as a curative power so much as a legitimate and healthy excitement.
Even Mrs. Linden noticed that the girl looked thin and pale, and showed
listlessness in place of energy, after several neighbors had openly
commented on the fact; she said placidly that she was really worried
about Dosia, and wished that she could have a change. And then one of
those impossible, wonderful things happened which alter the whole
surface of the earth. A rich aunt in Cincinnati wrote that Dosia was to
go to New York to study music, and spend the winter with a married
cousin, Lois Alexander, in one of the suburbs.
Thus it came that Theodosia was journeying North, dressed in a new suit
of blue serge, which had been sent from Atlanta, to fit her measure,
with the rest of her traveling outfit. As she sat in the Pullman car,
with her head in its little gray felt hat against the high back of the
seat, and looked down at the tips of her new shoes, and then at the
fingers of her new gloves, she felt like a princess.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account