The Works of Lucian of Samosata — Volume 03Lucian, of Samosata
Philosophy
The Works of Lucian of Samosata — Volume 03
Lucian, of Samosata
Lucian, of Samosata -- Translations into English
_Herm_. Good; they are as quiet as if they were so many
teachers of elocution. Now is the time for your speech; see, they
are all hanging on your lips.
_Zeus_. Why—there is something wrong with me—Hermes, my boy
—I will be frank with you. You know how confident and impressive I
always was as a public speaker?
_Herm_. I know; I used to be in such a fright; you threatened
sometimes to let down your golden cord and heave up earth and sea
from their foundations, Gods included.
_Zeus_. But to-day, my child—it may be this terrible crisis—
it may be the size of the audience—there is a vast number of Gods
here, isn’t there—anyhow, my thoughts are all mixed, I shiver, my
tongue seems tied. What is most absurd of all, my exordium is gone
clean out of my head; and I had prepared it on purpose to produce a
good impression at the start.
_Herm_. You have spoiled everything, Zeus. They cannot make
out your silence; they are expecting to hear of some terrible
disaster, to account for your delay.
_Zeus_. What do you think? Reel off the exordium in Homer?
_Herm_. Which one?
_Zeus_. Lend me your ears, Gods all and Goddesses.
_Herm_. Rubbish! you made quite exhibition enough of yourself
in that vein in our cabinet council. However, you might, if
you like, drop your metrical fustian, and adapt any one of
Demosthenes’s Philippics with a few alterations. That is the
fashionable method with speakers nowadays.
_Zeus_. Ah, that is a royal road to eloquence—simplifies
matters very much for a man in difficulties.
_Herm_. Go ahead, then.
_Zeus_. Men of—Heaven, I presume that you would be willing to
pay a great price, if you could know what in the world has
occasioned the present summons. Which being so, it is fitting that
you should give a ready hearing to my words. Now, whereas the
present crisis, Heavenians, may almost be said to lift up a voice
and bid us take vigorous hold on opportunity, it seems to me that
we are letting it slip from our nerveless grasp. And I wish now (I
can’t remember any more) to exhibit clearly to you the apprehensions
which have led to my summoning you.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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