The World's Illusion, Volume 2 (of 2): RuthWassermann, Jakob
General
The World's Illusion, Volume 2 (of 2): Ruth
Wassermann, Jakob
German fiction -- Translations into English
Michael nodded. He said he had hesitated a long time. In the
public-house he had heard the playing of a harmonica. It was an
exceedingly dirty house standing back from the street, an old house
with splotches of moisture on the wall and a wooden fence, and a pile
of bricks and refuse in front of it. At the door a dog had stood. “I
didn’t dare go past that dog,” said Michael, and mechanically folded
his hands. “He was so big and stared at me so treacherously. But Molly
Gutkind had seen me from the window (the house has only two storeys);
she beckoned to me, and the dog trotted out into the street. I went
into the house, and there was Molly on the stairs. She laughed and drew
me into her room. She served me with food, ham sandwiches and pastry.
To-day, she said, she’d be my hostess; next time I’d have to be her
host. She said she knew I was a Jew and she was glad; she always liked
Jews. If I’d be just a little bit nice to her, I’d never regret it. It
was all so peculiar. What was I to her? What could I be to her? I said
I’d go now, but she wouldn’t let me, and said I must stay with her. And
then...!”
“My dear boy,” Christian said, softly.
The tender words made the boy shudder all the more. He was silent for
many minutes. When he spoke again his voice sounded changed. He said
dully: “Three times I begged her to blow out the lamp, and at last she
did so. But something happened to the girl that I hadn’t expected. She
said she wouldn’t sin against me; she saw that she was a bad girl, and
I must forgive her. As she said this she wept, and she added that she
longed for her home with all her heart, and had a horror of her present
life. I seemed to be stricken dumb, but I was sorry for her with all
my heart. My body trembled and my teeth chattered, and I let her speak
and lament. When I saw that she had fallen asleep, I thought about
myself as deeply and severely as I could. It was dark and silent; I
heard nothing but the breathing of the girl. No guests were left in the
public-house below. It was uncannily silent; and with every moment’s
silence my old fear grew within me. Every moment it seemed to me that
that terrible silence must be broken. I watched the very seconds pass.
And suddenly I heard a cry. A sudden cry. How shall I describe it? It
came from deep, deep below, from under the earth, from behind walls. It
was not very loud or shrill, but it was a cry to make the heart stop
beating. It was like a ray, do you understand, a hot, thin, piercing
ray. I can compare it to nothing else. I thought--Ruth! My single
thought was--Ruth! Do you understand that? It was as though some one
had plunged an icy blade into my back. O God, it was terrible!”
“And what did you do?” asked Christian, white as the wall.
And Michael stammered that he had lain there and lain there, and
listened and listened.
“Is it possible that you didn’t jump up and rush out? That you
didn’t----? Is it possible?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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