The World's Illusion, Volume 2 (of 2): RuthWassermann, Jakob
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The World's Illusion, Volume 2 (of 2): Ruth
Wassermann, Jakob
German fiction -- Translations into English
She curled herself up more compactly under the covers, and continued
in a blunter tone. “It’s easy to say that--at the bottom; but really
there’s no such thing. There’s a lower depth under every depth; and
there ain’t no words to tell you how it is down there. No one can
imagine it who hasn’t been there. No seeing from the outside and no
knowing will make people realize it. You live in a place for which they
charge you five times as much as is fair and decent. You’re common
property, and everybody gets out of you all he can. You don’t care if
the place is elegant or like a pigsty. It gives you the horrors to open
the door of it. It ain’t yours; it’s everybody’s. It’s the place where
everybody sort of sheds his filth, and you know them all and remember
them all. It does you no good to go to bed and try to sleep. Another
day is bound to come. There are the same greasy public houses and the
same faces, always the same crowd. And then there’s the street--what
you call your territory. That’s where you go by night. You know every
window and crossing and lantern: you stare and turn and ogle and grin,
and open your umbrella if it rains, and walk and stand around and keep
a sharp eye on the police, and make up to any man if he’s got torn
shoes or sports a fur ulster. And then you promise him God knows what;
and all the time you’d like to scratch his heart out if he walks off,
or spit in his face if he condescends to you. There it is! That’s the
main thing. Pain and worry--Lord, all people have them. But what you
get to find out about men there--oh, I tell you!”
Her last words were a cry again, a great cry, such as that other cry
which Christian had not been able to forget. He sat very straight, and
looked past the lamp to a certain spot on the wall.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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