The Worst Joke in the WorldHolding, Elisabeth Sanxay
General
The Worst Joke in the World
Holding, Elisabeth Sanxay
Families -- Fiction; Mothers-in-law -- Fiction; United States -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction
She loved her children with all the strength of her soul, but she had
been wise in her love. She had tried always to be a little aloof from
them, never to be too familiar, never to be tiresome. She had given
them all she had, all her love and care and sympathy, and she had
wanted nothing in return. She wished them to think of her, not as weak
and helpless, but as strong and enduring, and always ready to give.
And now—
“Now I’m going to be a mother-in-law,” she said to herself. “Oh,
please God, help me! Help me not to be a burden to Molly and Robert!
Help me to stand aside and to hold my tongue! Oh, please God, help me
_not_ to be a mother-in-law!”
II
Mrs. Champney had arranged matters so as to reach the house just at
dinner time. She even hoped that she might be a little late, so that
there wouldn’t be any time at all to sit down and talk. She had never
dreaded anything as she dreaded that first moment, the crossing of
that threshold. Her hands and feet were like ice, her thin cheeks were
flushed, anticipating it. She wanted to enter in an agreeable little
stir and bustle, to be cheerful, to be casual; but Robert and Molly
were too young for that. They would be too cordial.
“I don’t expect them to want me,” said Mrs. Champney to herself. “They
can’t want me. If they’d only just not try—not pretend!”
She did not know Molly very well. She had seen her a good many
times—Molly and the incomparable baby—but that had been in the days
when Mrs. Champney was a fairy godmother, with all sorts of delightful
gifts to bestow. Robert’s wife had been a little shy with her. A kind,
honest girl, Mrs. Champney had thought her, good to look at in her
splendid health and vitality, but not very interesting. And now she
had to come into poor Molly’s house!
She was pleased to see that her train was late. She had not told them
what train she would take. Perhaps they wouldn’t keep dinner waiting.
When she got there, perhaps they would be sitting at the table. Then
she could hurry in, full of cheerful apologies, and sit down with
them, and there wouldn’t be that strained, terrible moment she so much
dreaded.
A vain hope! For, as she got out of the train, her heart sank to see
Robert there waiting for her—Robert with his glummest face, Robert at
his worst.
There was no denying that Robert had a worst. He was never willful and
provoking, as his adorable sister could be upon occasion. He was never
stormy and unreasonable, like his elder brother; but he could be what
Mrs. Champney privately called “heavy,” and that was, for her, one of
the most dismaying things any one could be. She saw at the first
glance that he was going to be heavy now.
“Mother!” he said, in a tone almost tragic.
“But, my dear boy, how in the world did you know I’d get this train?”
she asked gayly. “I didn’t write—”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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