Through These Eyes: The courageous struggle to find meaning in a life stressed with cancerIsaacson, Lauren Ann
Science
Through These Eyes: The courageous struggle to find meaning in a life stressed with cancer
Isaacson, Lauren Ann
Cancer -- Patients -- Biography; Isaacson, Lauren Ann, 1961-1986
With summer drawing to a close, my friends slowly drifted their
separate ways as the fall semester of 1982 beckoned and bid them to
cast away the carefree mood of days gone by. I, too, readied myself
for the new semester with apprehension; the purpose of continuing
school in my state of health eluded me, yet I felt too weak to contest
the arrangement. Drained from months of activity which depleted my
energy and abused my emotional stability, I knew also that I had
developed further symptoms of liver malfunction during the summer.
Even the mildest days, with temperatures reaching no higher than 70
degrees, would cause my body to overheat; if I did not remedy the
situation by chewing ice or removing myself from the location, I would
sweat profusely, and eventually obtain a relentless headache and
nausea. This symptom was altogether annoying and seemed to me a huge
inconvenience, as I could not sit comfortably in an atmosphere which
most people heartily enjoyed. In addition, I would tire easily and
found it increasingly more difficult to perform the least taxing of
functions such as rapidly ascending multiple flights of steps, without
reaching my destination quite breathless, my heart pounding at an
alarming rate.
Knowing these effects would not subside, I dreaded the coming months.
September and school seemed to fit together like pieces in a jigsaw.
I could not help but wonder where, in the world, I would possibly find
a niche.
I initially enrolled in four classes at Augustana, feeling obliged to
retain full-time status if I intended to obtain an education within a
reasonable period of time. From the outset, I elected to study German
as well as two other "staples," those being a Geography course and a
course in English literature. I still entertained the romantic notion
of traveling to Germany one day, utilizing with fluency and grace my
haphazard rendezvous with the native language. After two weeks in the
class, however, I deemed it too much of an emotional strain to attempt
a new tongue under the pressure of the teacher who radiated the
likeness and temperament of Adolph Hitler. Quickly moved to a
decision, I dropped the course to add another in English which tackled
the various plays of Shakespeare. This, I thought, would be more apt
to lie within my realm of understanding.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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