Through These Eyes: The courageous struggle to find meaning in a life stressed with cancerIsaacson, Lauren Ann
Science
Through These Eyes: The courageous struggle to find meaning in a life stressed with cancer
Isaacson, Lauren Ann
Cancer -- Patients -- Biography; Isaacson, Lauren Ann, 1961-1986
Mail delivery was an exalted highlight of the day, arriving sometime
after the lunch hour. I had always loved mail, yet this lavish
assortment of cards and letters was a recipe for happiness, and helped
to alleviate the disappointment of not having received a lunch tray.
The opening of mail was a tremendous pastime, bringing rhyme and
laughter to the afternoon. After reading the cards, I would reread
them, picturing the individual or family who took the time to send the
cards. The familiar names written at the bottom of a card or note
conjured images of home... and of friends, which instilled my parent's
day with warmth, even as it had enlightened my own.
Two weeks had passed since Dr. A. had started my IV in the ICU when it
began to infiltrate. Hating to remove it, the nurses would fiddle with
the needle's position, pushing or pulling, and try to ignore the fact
that it, like all good things, must come to an end. I tried to bear
up to its failure, but also hoped wildly that the IV would function for
one. . .more. . .day. The trials I had endured before Dr. A.'s success
were still fresh in my memory.
Despite repeated attempts to save my two week old ally, its rapid
failure demanded attention as my hand swelled like a balloon and the
vein in which the needle resided stung intensely; it could no longer
remain unnoticed in my distorted hand. The needle was pulled, and the
nurses went in search of a willing person to "install" another.
As a replacement for my duo-purpose IV, which dripped nourishment as
well as an anti-infection drug into my system, I somehow found myself
with an IV in both arms, one for each purpose, leaving my hands
virtually immobile and completely useless for any sort of craft that I
might have desired to undertake. This certainly was a lousy state of
affairs, I thought, contemplating the television rather sullenly amid
my twisted array of tubes. Dr. W. entered the room holding his
clipboard and beheld the new entanglement which extended into both
arms. "Well, looks like you won't be putting in your contacts
tomorrow." I thought I detected a note of triumphant glee in his
voice. "I don't know. . ." I answered, my voice trailing off into
nothingness; the new day would reveal what I could and could not do.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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