England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; English fiction -- 19th century
'Oh, why have we girls to get our knowledge so late and with such
labour!' Annabel exclaimed at length. 'You learn Greek and Latin when
you are children; it ought to be the same with us. I am impatient; I
want to read straight on.'
'You very soon will,' he replied absently. Then, having glanced at the
windows, which were suddenly illumined with a broad slant of sunlight,
he asked: 'Will you come out? It will be delightful after the rain.'
Annabel was humming over dactylics. She put her book aside with
reluctance.
'I'll go and ask my cousin.'
Egremont averted his face. Annabel went up to Paula's room, knocked,
and entered. From a bustling sound within, it appeared likely that Miss
Tyrrell's business-like attitude at the table had been suddenly assumed.
'Will you come out, Paula? The rain is over and gone.'
'Not now.'
'Mr. Egremont wishes to go for a walk. Couldn't you come?'
'Please beg Mr. Egremont to excuse me. I am tired after yesterday,
dear.'
When her cousin had withdrawn Paula went to the window. In a few
minutes she saw Egremont and Annabel go forth and stroll from the
garden towards the lake. Then she reseated herself, and sat biting her
pen.
The two walked lingeringly by the water's edge. They spoke of trifles.
When they were some distance from the house, Egremont said:
'So you see I have at last found my work. If you thought of me at all,
I dare say my life seemed to you a very useless one, and little likely
to lead to anything.'
'No, I had not that thought, Mr. Egremont,' she answered simply. 'I
felt sure that you were preparing yourself for something worthy.'
'I hope that is the meaning of these years that have gone so quickly.
But it was not conscious preparation. It has often seemed to me that in
travelling and gaining experience I was doing all that life demanded of
me. Few men can be more disposed to idle dreaming than I am. And even
now I keep asking myself whether this, too, is only a moment of
idealism, which will go by and leave me with less practical energy than
ever. Every such project undertaken and abandoned is a weight upon a
man's will. If I fail in perseverance my fate will be decided.'
'I feel assured that you will not fail. You could not speak as you did
last night and yet allow yourself to falter in purpose when the task
was once begun. What success may await you we cannot say; the work will
certainly be very difficult. Will it not ask a lifetime?'
'No less, if it is to have any lasting result.'
'Be glad, then. What happier thing can befall one than to have one's
life consecrated to a worthy end!'
He walked on in silence, then regarded her.
'Such words in such a voice would make any man strong. Yet I would ask
more from you. There is one thing I need to feel full confidence in
myself, and that is a woman's love. I have known for a long time whose
love it was that I must try to win. Can you give me what I ask?'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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