Paris (France) -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Short stories, English
The thought floated across her mind impersonally. It brought no
shock, because it did not present itself as a temptation, even the
faintest; it was just as if she had been recognising what somebody in
a tale might do. Without purpose, without questioning why the thought
fascinated her, she sat seeing how easily she could steal the money.
The ticket was on the table; there was nothing to show that she hadn't
any right to it--she had merely to claim the prize. There would be a
fort-night's delay, at least, before she got it. Well, she could eke
out the sum that was put by for her fare. She imagined her sensations
on the morning that she walked from the bank with notes for twelve
thousand francs in her pocket. If her pocket were picked! Yielding even
more intently to the thought, she perceived that the proper course
would be to open an account before she left.... It wouldn't be twelve
thousand francs--a substantial sum would be deducted for _les droits
des pauvres._ But it would be enough--the price of power! The thought
leapt further. She saw herself, gorgeously gowned, on a platform--heard
the very piece that she was playing, the plaudits that came thundering;
she trembled in the emotion of a visionary fame.
Recalling her, there sounded, in the dark emptiness again, the minor
jangle of a cab-horse bell.
Then she understood. It had been no idle supposition, the thought that
mastered her. "_O divine Vierge Marie_!" she wailed on her knees, and
knew that she wanted to be a thief.
Through the night, through the morrow, through every waking moment,
a voice was saying to her: "You _won't_ be robbing a child; you can
do for it all that She did--every month, just the same thing. Long
before the child is old enough to need so large a sum you will be in a
position to give it to him. What will he have lost? Nothing. You are
terrified by the semblance of a sin; it is not a sin really. Dare it,
dare it, be bold!"
Nothing could quell the voice. It was whispering while she prayed. And
the crashing of orchestras could not drown it, when she fled to music
for relief.
She learnt that the woman in Amiens was called Gaillard, and had a
shop in the rue Puteaux. But now she shrank from writing to her--she
didn't know how she meant to act. Once, in desperation, she did begin a
letter, an avowal of the prize that had been drawn; but she hesitated
again.
There was an evening when, with steps that wavered, like a woman
enfeebled by illness, she packed her things to return to Chauville....
She sat wide-eyed, staring at the trunk.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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