“Old chap,” said Ralph, touching his friend on the shoulder, “I never
was one to talk; but it’s very hard lines on you, and Mrs. Bertram ought
to be told so, if she were the queen.”
Bertram shook his head. “I don’t know why I told you,” he said; “don’t
let us talk of it any more. The thing’s done and can’t be undone. I
don’t know if I wish any change. When two paths part in this world,
Wradisley, don’t you know, the longer they go, the wider apart they
get--or at least that’s my experience. They say your whole body changes
every seven years--it doesn’t take so long as that to alter a man’s
thoughts and his soul--and a woman’s, too, I suppose. She’s far enough
from me now, and I from her. I’m not sure I--regret it. In some ways
it--didn’t suit me, so to speak. Perhaps things are best as they are.”
“Well,” said Ralph, “I’d choose a free life for myself, but not exactly
in that way, Bertram--not if I were you.”
“Fortunately we are none of us each other,” Bertram said, with a laugh
which had little mirth in it. He added, after a moment: “You’ll use your
own discretion about telling this sorry tale of mine, Wradisley. I felt
I had to tell you. I can’t go about under false pretenses while you’re
responsible for me. Now you know the whole business, and we need not
speak of it any more.”
“All right, old fellow,” Ralph said; and they quickened their pace, and
put on I don’t know how many miles more before they got back--too late
for lunch, and very muddy about the legs--to eat a great deal of cold
beef at the sideboard, while the servants chafed behind them, intent
upon changing the great dining-room into a bower of chrysanthemums and
temple of tea. They had to change their dress afterwards, which took up
all their time until the roll of carriages began. Bertram, for his part,
being a stranger and not at all on duty, took a long time to put himself
into more presentable clothes. He did not want to have any more of the
garden party than was necessary. And his mind had been considerably
stirred up by his confession, brief as it was. It had been necessary to
do it, and his mind was relieved; but he did not feel that it was
possible to remain long at Wradisbury now that he had disclosed his
mystery, such as it was. What did they care about his mystery?
Nothing--not enough to make a day’s conversation out of it. He knew very
well in what way Ralph would tell his story. He would not announce it as
a discovery--it would drop from his beard like the most casual statement
of fact: “Unlucky beggar, Bertram--got a wife and all that sort of
thing--place down Devonshire way--but he and she don’t hit it off,
somehow.” In such terms the story would be told, without any mystery at
all. But Bertram, who was a proud man, did not feel that he could live
among a set of people who looked at him curiously across the table and
wondered how it was that he did not “hit it off” with his wife. He knew
that he would read that question in Mrs. Wradisley’s face when she bade
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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