“Now that’s bad,” and he scratched his head vigorously. “Can you smoke,
then?”
“A little,” faltered I.
My new-made friend seemed much pleased by this response, and
continued,--
“All right; you jist git a lot of clay pipes and some tobaccy, and I’ll
git you a pass!”
As I was turning in utter bewilderment to have his strange prescription
filled, “I say, look a here,” he said; “take off all that nice harness,
or you can’t pass for no cattle-man! I’ll lend you some old clothes and
a pair of big boots. These stock conductors is right peert, they air.
You’ll have to smoke a heap, and lay around careless in the caboose, or
they’ll find you out.”
* * * * *
The next morning I took my seat in what he called the “caboose,”--a sort
of passenger-car at the end of the train. When we had been under way
about an hour, the burden of my own conscience, or of my friend’s boots,
or the contemplation of my unsightly disguise, or the amount of tobacco
I had smoked, made me deathly sick,--which, on the whole, was rather a
fortunate circumstance. It explained to the conductor why I did not get
out at the way-stations to tend my cattle, and it also enabled me to
hide my face from the conductor, to whom I happened to be known.
I found, as most boys do, that I could smoke better the farther I got
from home. What with stopping to let our cattle rest and other delays,
it took us nearly a week to reach New York; but before three days had
passed I could perform the astonishing feat of putting my friend’s boots
out of the car window, and of smoking serenely the while, without
touching my pipe with my hands.
All the hotels at which we stopped along the route seemed, like the
crèmeries of Paris, to exult in the importance of a _spécialité_; and
that was that they were supported almost entirely by drovers, and
assumed, without a single exception that I can call to mind, the device
and title of “The Bull’s Head.”
There was a smack of old times in the homely comforts as well as in the
moderate charges of these quiet taverns. My expenses on the whole
journey from Toledo to the sea were, if I recollect aright, a little
over three dollars.
CHAPTER II.
TAKING TO EUROPEAN WAYS.
At New York I found that I should be obliged to pay 130 for exchange on
my money. This I did, after buying a through third-class ticket to
London for thirty-three dollars in currency.
My memories of a steerage passage across the Atlantic are rather vivid
than agreeable. Among all my fellow-passengers in that unsavory precinct
I found only one philosopher. He was a British officer who took a
third-class ticket that he might spend the difference between that and a
cabin fare for English porter, which he imbibed from morning to night.
He announced as his firm belief, after much observation upon the high
cheekbones of our countrymen, that the Americans in a few years would
degenerate to Indians,--the natural human types of this continent.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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