"One thinks one has a soul sometimes," she mused. "It isn't true. It
would prevent one's clothes fitting, wouldn't it? One really acts
in this way or that because _it's better form_. You see here on the
Continent it's good form to tear one's hair and roll on the floor, and
to pretend to have a soul; we've got beyond that, as we've got beyond
women trying to seem to know about art and literature. Here they do, and
make idiots of themselves. Just now you thought I'd got a soul, didn't
you, Mr. Marion? You've been wondering all along whether I had one. For
a minute I managed to make you believe it--it was rather mean of me,
wasn't it? I haven't got one. I'm a great deal too well-bred."
There was a little soreness under all this banter; but how could she
banter? Marion felt he detested the woman, as she put out her elbow and
extended a stiff handsome hand, and said:
"Remember poor old _Christina_ to-morrow morning, there's a kind man,"
with that little smile of close eyes and close lips. He detested her
just in proportion as he had liked her half an hour ago. Remembering
that little gush of feeling of his own, he thought her a base creature,
as he walked across the little moonlit square with the well in the
middle and the tall white houses all round.
Jervase Marion, the next morning, woke up with the consciousness of
having been very unfair to Lady Tal, and, what was worse, very unfair to
himself. It was one of the drawbacks of friendship (for, after all, this
was a kind of friendship) that he occasionally caught himself saying
things quite different from his thoughts and feelings, masquerading
towards people in a manner distinctly humiliating to his self-respect.
Marion had a desire to be simple and truthful; but somehow it was
difficult to be simple and truthful as soon as other folk came into
play; it was difficult and disagreeable to show one's real self; that
was another reason for living solitary on a top flat at Westminster, and
descending therefrom in the body, but not in the spirit, to move about
among mere acquaintances, disembodied things, with whom there was no
fear of real contact. On this occasion he had let himself come in
contact with a fellow-creature; and behold, as a result, he had not only
behaved more or less like a cad, but he had done that odious thing of
pretending to feel differently from how he really did.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account