Wee Johnnie Paterson, & other humorous sketches — John Shaqi
Wee Johnnie Paterson, & other humorous sketchesStevenson, W. Grant (William Grant)
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Wee Johnnie Paterson, & other humorous sketches
Stevenson, W. Grant (William Grant)
English fiction -- Scottish authors; Humorous stories, Scottish
Feeling rather cold I thought I would be the better of a little
spirits, and being overcome I fell asleep in the arm-chair, while
Stewart and his companions began another adjournment. I must have
been completely worn-out with fatigue, for I don't remember getting
to bed.
Breakfast was considerably later than usual next morning, and Mrs.
Stewart asked when we got home. I did not know what to say, but
Stewart did. He said, "It would be efter twelve, wouldn't it?" as if
we were not sure. I said in the most doubtful tone I could raise, "I
daresay it would."
I think there must be some truth in the proverb that there is a
special providence for children and a certain class of men, for
Stewart was quite fresh in spite of his exposure the previous night;
and if not to this cause, to the mildness of the season must be
ascribed his immunity from influenza.
JOHNNIE GIBB'S FUNERAL
"Are ye in, Mrs. Broon?"
"Ay, come awa' in, Mrs. Mitchell."
"Eh no, I mannie come in," says Mrs. Mitchell, coming in all the
time, "for I've jist left my tatties on the fire, an' whaur there's
bairns, ye ken, yin's aye feared."
"Ay, that's true. I'm jist washin' some peenies, for I declare when
ye hev a family ye need never sit doon."
[Illustration: "I'M JUST WASHIN' SOME PEENIES" _By R. M'Gregor,
R.S.A._]
"Ay, that's true. I dinna ken hoo some women aye manage to be at
their doors or in their neebors' hooses, for I can tell ye I never
devauld fae workin' fae mornin' to nicht; but I was jist thro win'
oot some dirty water the noo, an' I see they're getherin' for Johnnie
Gibb's funeral, puir man."
"Ay! it's an awfu' thing that sudden death."
"Eh, haud yer tongue, it is that; it's enough to kill a horse."
"Ay, bit there's nae use tryin' to gang against Providence."
"Eh no, especially wi' some o' they new-fashioned troubles."
"Ay! but it'll mak' an awfu' difference in that hoose, for Mrs.
Gibb's a wumman o' this kind,--an' mind I'm no sayin' onything
against the wumman aither, for she's a guid enough wumman maybe, but
yin canna keep their een shut a'thegither an' no see that Johnnie
wusna attended to as he micht a' been."
"Ay, that's true; as I often say to my man, 'Hoo wud ye like to hae
yer ain tea to mak' efter comin' in fae a hard day's wark?' I'm
share my man wudna dae't, an' I wudna ask um; but it disna look weel
to see a man plouterin' aboot an' dain' women's wark; an' we've heard
o' sic things,--atween you an' me, an' it's no gaun ony
farrer,--we've heard o' sic things as gettin' a gill fae the grocer,
an' tellin' um to mark it doon, 'Bread, sixpence.'"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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