What Every Woman KnowsBarrie, J. M. (James Matthew)
General
What Every Woman Knows
Barrie, J. M. (James Matthew)
Comedy plays; Man-woman relationships -- Drama
MAGGIE [hesitating]. He is very busy just now.
VENABLES [smiling]. I think he will see me.
MAGGIE. Is it something about his speech?
VENABLES [the smile hardening]. Well, yes, it is.
MAGGIE. Then I dare say I could tell you what you want to know without
troubling him, as I’ve been typing it.
VENABLES [with a sigh]. I don’t acquire information in that way.
COMTESSE. I trust not.
MAGGIE. There’s no secret about it. He is to show it to the whips
tonight.
VENABLES [sharply]. You are sure of that?
COMTESSE. It is quite true, Charles. I heard him say so; and indeed he
repeated what he called the ‘peroration’ before me.
MAGGIE. I know it by heart. [She plays a bold game.] ‘These are the
demands of all intelligent British women, and I am proud to nail them to
my flag’--
COMTESSE. The very words, Mrs. Shand.
MAGGIE [looking at her imploringly]. ‘And I don’t care how they may
embarrass the Government.’ [The COMTESSE is bereft of speech, so
suddenly has she been introduced to the real MAGGIE SHAND]. ‘If the
right honourable gentleman will give us his pledge to introduce a
similar Bill this session I will willingly withdraw mine; but otherwise
I solemnly warn him that I will press the matter now to a division.’
[She turns her face from the great man; she has gone white.]
VENABLES [after a pause]. Capital.
[The blood returns to MAGGIE’s heart.]
COMTESSE [who is beginning to enjoy herself very much]. Then you are
pleased to know that he means to, as you say, go to a division?
VENABLES. Delighted. The courage of it will be the making of him.
COMTESSE. I see.
VENABLES. Had he been to hedge we should have known that he was a
pasteboard knight and have disregarded him.
COMTESSE. I see.
[She desires to catch the eye of MAGGIE, but it is carefully turned from
her.]
VENABLES. Mrs. Shand, let us have him in at once.
COMTESSE. Yes, yes, indeed.
[MAGGIE’s anxiety returns, but she has to call JOHN in.]
JOHN [impressed]. Mr. Venables! This is an honour.
VENABLES. How are you, Shand?
JOHN. Sit down, sit down. [Becoming himself again.] I can guess what you
have come about.
VENABLES. Ah, you Scotsmen.
JOHN. Of course I know I’m harassing the Government a good deal--
VENABLES [blandly]. Not at all, Shand. The Government are very pleased.
JOHN. You don’t expect me to believe that?
VENABLES. I called here to give you the proof of it. You may know that
we are to have a big meeting at Leeds on the 24th, when two Ministers
are to speak. There is room for a third speaker, and I am authorised to
offer that place to you.
JOHN. To me!
VENABLES. Yes.
JOHN [swelling]. It would be--the Government taking me up.
VENABLES. Don’t make too much of it; it would be an acknowledgment that
they look upon you as one of their likely young men.
MAGGIE. John!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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