"'Tis an easy matter," and Patty hooked it off on the end of a golf-club. "Young ladies," she said, with a wave of the kettle, "there is nothing like a college education to teach you a way out of every difficulty. If, when you are out in the wide, wide world--" "Where, oh, where are the grave old seniors?" chanted the Twin. "Where, oh, where are they?" The rest took it up, and Patty waited patiently. "They've gone out of Cairnsley's ethics, They've gone out of Cairnsley's ethics, They've gone out of Cairnsley's ethics, Into the wide, wide w-o-r-l-d." "If you have finished your ovation, young ladies, I will proceed with my lecture. When, as I say, you are out in the wide, wide world, making five-o'clock tea some afternoon for one of the young men popularly supposed to be there, who have dropped in to make an afternoon call--Do you follow me, young ladies, or do I speak too fast? If, while you are engaged in conversation, the kettle should become too hot, do not put your finger in your mouth and shriek 'Ouch!' and coquettishly say to the young man, '_You_ take it off,' as might a young woman who has not enjoyed your advantages; but, rather, rise to the emergency; say to him calmly, 'This kettle has become over-heated; may I trouble you to go into the hall and bring an umbrella?' and when he returns you can hook it off gracefully and expeditiously as you have seen me do, young ladies, and the young--" "Patty, take care!" This from Priscilla. "O-u-c-h!" in a long-drawn wail. This from Georgie. Patty hastily set the kettle down on the floor. "I'm awfully sorry, Georgie. Does it hurt?" "Not in the least. It's really a pleasant sensation to have boiling water poured over you." The Bartlet Twin sniffed. "I smell burning rug." Patty groaned. "I resign, Pris; I resign. Here, you preside. I'll never ask to make it again." "I should like," observed the Twin, "to see Patty entertaining a young man." "It's not such an unprecedented event," said Patty, with some warmth. "You can watch me to-morrow night if it will give you so much pleasure." "To-morrow night? Are you going to have a man for the Prom?" "That," said Patty, "is my intention." "And you haven't asked me for a dance!" This in an aggrieved chorus from the entire room. "I haven't asked any one," said Patty, with dignity. "Do you mean you're going to have all of the twenty dances with him yourself?" "Oh, no; I don't expect to dance more than ten with him myself--I haven't made out his card yet," she added. "Why not?" "I never do." "Has he been here before, then?" "No; that's the reason." "The reason for what?" "Well," Patty deigned to explain, "I've invited him for every party since freshman year." "And did he decline?" "No; he accepted, but he never came." "Why not?" "He was scared." "Scared? Of the girls?" "Yes," said Patty, "partly--but mostly of the faculty." "The _faculty_ wouldn't hurt him."