Wilhelm Meister's apprenticeship and travels, vol. 1 (of 2)Goethe, Johann Wolfgang von
General
Wilhelm Meister's apprenticeship and travels, vol. 1 (of 2)
Goethe, Johann Wolfgang von
Bildungsromans; German fiction -- Translations into English; Self-realization -- Fiction
The pressure of his arms, the emotion of his elevated voice, awoke
Mariana, who hastened by caresses to conceal her embarrassment; for no
word of the last part of his story had reached her. It is to be wished,
that in future, our hero, when recounting his favorite histories, may
find more attentive hearers.
CHAPTER IX.
Thus Wilhelm passed his nights in the enjoyment of confiding love, his
days in the expectation of new happy hours. When desire and hope had
first attracted him to Mariana, he already felt as if inspired with new
life; felt as if he were beginning to be another man: he was now united
to her; the contentment of his wishes had become a delicious habitude.
His heart strove to ennoble the object of his passion; his spirit, to
exalt with it the young creature whom he loved. In the shortest absence,
thoughts of her arose within him. If she had once been necessary to him,
she was now grown indispensable, now that he was bound to her by all the
ties of nature. His pure soul felt that she was the half, more than the
half, of himself. He was grateful and devoted without limit.
Mariana, too, succeeded in deceiving herself for a season: she shared
with him the feeling of his liveliest blessedness. Alas! if but the
cold hand of self-reproach had not often come across her heart! She was
not secure from it, even in Wilhelm's bosom, even under the wings of his
love. And when she was again left alone, again left to sink from the
clouds, to which passion had exalted her, into the consciousness of her
real condition, then she was indeed to be pitied. So long as she had
lived among degrading perplexities, disguising from herself her real
situation, or rather never thinking of it, frivolity had helped her
through; the incidents she was exposed to had come upon her each by
itself; satisfaction and vexation had cancelled one another; humiliation
had been compensated by vanity; want by frequent, though momentary,
superfluity; she could plead necessity and custom as a law or an excuse;
and hitherto all painful emotions from hour to hour, and from day to
day, had by these means been shaken off. But now, for some instants, the
poor girl had felt herself transported to a better world; aloft, as it
were, in the midst of light and joy, she had looked down upon the abject
desert of her life, had felt what a miserable creature is the woman,
who, inspiring desire, does not also inspire reverence and love: she
regretted and repented, but found herself outwardly or inwardly no
better for regret. She had nothing that she could accomplish or resolve
upon. When she looked into and searched herself, all was waste and void
within her soul: her heart had no place of strength or refuge. But the
more sorrowful her state was, the more vehemently did her feelings cling
to the man she loved: her passion for him even waxed stronger daily, as
the danger of losing him came daily nearer.
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