Suddenly I noticed him stagger; he made a grab for one of the ropes to protect himself, but missed it. I closed my eyes in horror as I saw him fall—the blood seemed to freeze in my very veins—I felt faint. [Illustration: I closed my eyes in horror ] I could stand the suspense no longer. I opened my eyes, but all seemed blurred before them. “Is he dead?” I asked of a man standing by my side. “No; he’s all right,” the man answered. “But he fell, didn’t he?” I cried. “O, yes, he fell all right,” he said; “but he landed on a bunch of rubber-necks and bounced back on the scaffold again.” * * * * * Wishing to make the jump from New York to Chicago a few weeks ago, I called on a friend of mine who stands pretty well with one of the officials of a certain railroad. I asked my friend if he thought he could get me a rate over that line, and he promised to see what he could do for me. He said: “I’ll go right down, and if I can possibly get you a rate I’ll send word up to your hotel.” I said: “All right, old man; I’ll appreciate it very much.” After waiting around the hotel for about an hour I recollected that I had a little business to transact down town, and I thought I’d have time to attend to it and get back to my hotel before the message arrived concerning the rate. So I bought a newspaper and jumped on a down-town car. I had scarcely rode over four or five blocks when the conductor came by and shook me roughly by the arm and said, in a rough, surly manner: “Hey, you! Did you expectorate? [Expect a rate.] Now don’t sit there and tell me that you didn’t,” he added, “for I know you did.” [Illustration: “Hey, you! did you expectorate?” ] I was on my feet in an instant. “Why, you little insignificant, illiterate collector of plugged coins and dispenser of pennies!” I cried. “What do you mean by insulting me before this car full of people? Yes,” I said, “I did expect a rate, but that’s my affair. It’s none of your confounded business, nor anyone else’s, if I expect a pass! What I expect and what I don’t expect concern me alone!” “O, is that so?” he sneered. “You’re going to bluff me—that’s what you expect. Now here’s what you don’t expect”—and he called a policeman and had me arrested for spitting on the floor of the car. * * * * * Did you ever have the toothache? My! but isn’t it a great thing to make you forget all your other troubles? I had the toothache the other night, and it nearly had me wild. I wouldn’t have minded being awakened by the tooth so much, but it was the nerve of the thing that struck me—and it struck me properly. I jumped up, dressed myself and dashed over to the dentist’s. I said: “Doc, you argue with it, will you—you’ve got more of a pull than I have.” [Illustration: Dashed over to the dentist’s ]