_Mrs. Squeam._ Sir Jasper, your servant: where is the odious beast? _Sir Jasp._ He's within in his chamber, with my wife; she's playing the wag with him. _Mrs. Squeam._ Is she so? and he's a clownish beast, he'll give her no quarter, he'll play the wag with her again, let me tell you: come, let's go help her--What, the door's locked? _Sir Jasp._ Ay, my wife locked it. _Mrs. Squeam._ Did she so? let's break it open then. _Sir Jasp._ No, no, he'll do her no hurt. _Mrs. Squeam._ [_Aside._] But is there no other way to get in to 'em? whither goes this? I will disturb 'em. [_Exit at another door._ _Enter_ Old Lady SQUEAMISH. _L. Squeam._ Where is this harlotry, this impudent baggage, this rambling tomrigg?[79] O Sir Jasper, I'm glad to see you here; did you not see my vile grandchild come in hither just now? _Sir Jasp._ Yes. _L. Squeam._ Ay, but where is she then? where is she? Lord, Sir Jasper, I have e'en rattled myself to pieces in pursuit of her: but can you tell what she makes here? they say below, no woman lodges here. _Sir Jasp._ No. _L. Squeam._ No! what does she here then? say, if it be not a woman's lodging, what makes she here? But are you sure no woman lodges here? _Sir Jasp._ No, nor no man neither, this is Mr. Horner's lodging. _L. Squeam._ Is it so, are you sure? _Sir Jasp._ Yes, yes. _L. Squeam._ So; then there's no hurt in't, I hope. But where is he? _Sir Jasp._ He's in the next room with my wife. _L. Squeam._ Nay, if you trust him with your wife, I may with my Biddy. They say, he's a merry harmless man now, e'en as harmless a man as ever came out of Italy with a good voice, and as pretty, harmless company for a lady, as a snake without his teeth. _Sir Jasp._ Ay, ay, poor man. _Re-enter_ Mrs. SQUEAMISH. _Mrs. Squeam._ I can't find 'em.--Oh, are you here, grandmother? I followed, you must know, my Lady Fidget hither; 'tis the prettiest lodging, and I have been staring on the prettiest pictures-- _Re-enter_ Lady FIDGET _with a piece of china in her hand, and_ HORNER _following._ _L. Fid._ And I have been toiling and moiling for the prettiest piece of china, my dear. _Horn._ Nay, she has been too hard for me, do what I could. _Mrs. Squeam._ Oh, lord, I'll have some china too. Good Mr. Horner, don't think to give other people china, and me none; come in with me too. _Horn._ Upon my honour, I have none left now. _Mrs. Squeam._ Nay, nay, I have known you deny your china before now, but you shan't put me off so. Come. _Horn._ This lady had the last there. _L. Fid._ Yes indeed, madam, to my certain knowledge, he has no more left. _Mrs. Squeam._ O, but it may be he may have some you could not find. _L. Fid._ What, d'ye think if he had had any left, I would not have had it too? for we women of quality never think we have china enough.