_Old._ Hear the court. _Wid._ Thou art some debauched, drunken, lewd, hectoring, gaming companion, and wantest some widow's old gold to nick[109] upon; but I thank you, sir, that's for my lawyers. _Free._ Faith, we should ne'er quarrel about that; for guineas would serve my turn.[110] But, widow-- _Wid._ Thou art a foul-mouthed boaster of thy lust, a mere bragadochio of thy strength for wine and women, and wilt belie thyself more than thou dost women, and art every way a base deceiver of women; and would deceive me too, would you? _Free._ Nay, faith, widow, this is judging without seeing the evidence. _Wid._ I say, you are a worn-out whoremaster at five-and-twenty, both in body and fortune, and cannot be trusted by the common wenches of the town, lest you should not pay 'em; nor by the wives of the town lest you should pay 'em: so you want women, and would have me your bawd to procure 'em for you. _Free._ Faith, if you had any good acquaintance, widow, 'twould be civilly done of thee; for I am just come from sea. _Wid._ I mean, you would have me keep you, that you might turn keeper; for poor widows are only used like bawds by you; you go to church with us, but to get other women to lie with. In fine, you are a cheating, cozening spendthrift; and having sold your own annuity, would waste my jointure. _Jer._ And make havoc of our estate personal, and all our gilt plate; I should soon be piling up all our mortgaged apostle-spoons, bowls, and beakers, out of most of the ale-houses betwixt Hercules-pillars[111] and the Boatswain in Wapping; nay, and you'd be scouring amongst my trees, and make 'em knock down one another, like routed reeling watchmen at midnight; would you so, bully? _Free._ Nay, prithee, widow, hear me. _Wid._ No, sir; I'd have you to know, thou pitiful, paltry, lath-backed fellow, if I would have married a young man, 'tis well known I could have had any young heir in Norfolk, nay, the hopefullest young man this day at the King's-bench bar; I that am a relict and executrix of known plentiful assets and parts, who understand myself and the law. And would you have me under covert-baron[112] again? No, sir, no covert-baron for me. _Free._ But, dear widow, hear me. I value you only, not your jointure. _Wid._ Nay, sir, hold there; I know your love to a widow is covetousness of her jointure: and a widow, a little stricken in years, with a good jointure, is like an old mansion-house in a good purchase, never valued, but take one, take t'other: and perhaps, when you are in possession, you'd neglect it, let it drop to the ground, for want of necessary repairs or expenses upon't. _Free._ No, widow, one would be sure to keep all tight, when one is to forfeit one's lease by dilapidation. _Wid._ Fy! fy! I neglect my business with this foolish discourse of love. Jerry, child, let me see the list of the jury: I'm sure my cousin Olivia has some relations amongst them. But where is she? _Free._ Nay, widow, but hear me one word only.