_L. Flip._ No, no, my mischance (as you call it) is greater than that. I have but three months to reckon, ere I lie down with my port and equipage, and must be delivered of a woman, a footman, and a coachman:--for my coach must down, unless I can get Sir Simon to draw with me. _Mrs. Joyn._ He will pair with you exactly if you knew all. [_Aside._ _L. Flip._ Ah, Mrs. Joyner, nothing grieves me like the putting down my coach! For the fine clothes, the fine lodgings,--let 'em go; for a lodging is as unnecessary a thing to a widow that has a coach, as a hat to a man that has a good peruke. For, as you see about town, she is most properly at home in her coach:--she eats, and drinks, and sleeps in her coach; and for her visits, she receives them in the playhouse. _Mrs. Joyn._ Ay, ay, let the men keep lodgings, as you say, madam, if they will. _Enter behind, at one door,_ GRIPE _and_ Sir SIMON ADDLEPLOT, _the latter in the dress of a_ Clerk; _at the other,_ Mrs. MARTHA. _L. Flip._ Do you think if things had been with me as they have been, I would ever have housed with this counter-fashion brother of mine, (who hates a vest as much as a surplice,) to have my patches assaulted every day at dinner, my freedom censured, and my visitants shut out of doors?--Poor Mr. Dapperwit cannot be admitted. _Mrs. Joyn._ He knows him too well to keep his acquaintance. _L. Flip._ He is a censorious rigid fop, and knows nothing. _Gripe._ So, so! [_Behind._ _Mrs. Joyn._ [_Aside._] Is he here?--[_To_ Lady FLIPPANT.] Nay, with your pardon, madam, I must contradict you there. He is a prying commonwealth's-man, an implacable magistrate, a sturdy pillar of his cause, and--[_To_ GRIPE] But, oh me, is your worship so near then? if I had thought you heard me-- _Gripe._ Why, why, Mrs. Joyner, I have said as much of myself ere now; and without vanity, I profess. _Mrs. Joyn._ I know your virtue is proof against vainglory; but the truth to your face looks like flattery in your worship's servant. _Gripe._ No, no; say what you will of me in that kind, far be it from me to suspect you of flattery. _Mrs. Joyn._ In truly, your worship knows yourself, and knows me, for I am none of those-- _L. Flip._ [_Aside._] Now they are in--Mrs. Joyner, I'll go before to your house, you'll be sure to come after me. _Mrs. Joyn._ Immediately.--[_Exit_ Lady FLIPPANT.] But as I was saying, I am none of those-- _Gripe._ No, Mrs. Joyner, you cannot sew pillows under folks' elbows; you cannot hold a candle to the devil; you cannot tickle a trout to take him; you-- _Mrs. Joyn._ Lord, how well you do know me indeed!--and you shall see I know your worship as well. You cannot backslide from your principles; you cannot be terrified by the laws; nor bribed to allegiance by office or preferment; you-- _Gripe._ Hold, hold, my praise must not interrupt yours. _Mrs. Joyn._ With your worship's pardon, in truly, I must on. _Gripe._ I am full of your praise, and it will run over.