She became a woman of woodland enchantment, a slender nymph darting
in and out between the trees of an autumn-colored forest, her skin
berry-stained. She became a woman pirouetting on a stage, clad like a
Russian ballet dancer. She became a dancer in flowing robes, moving in
slow, sensual rhythm under the spell of a weaving baton. The baton rose
and fell, gleamed and swayed and the music became tumultuous, and then,
abruptly, the baton ceased to move and there was only silence and
darkness on the stage.
Then, all at once, he saw her again as she really was, standing with
slightly parted lips within reach of his arms, so unbelievably near
that he could have clasped her and drawn her to him by taking a single
step forward. The fantasies conjured up by the voice--were they
hallucinatory or merely mind-beguiling?--became shadowy and unreal, and
her actual physical presence was all that concerned him.
In daring dreams Loring had, like most men, imagined what it would be
like to make instant and completely uninhibited love to a woman without
preamble and with no need to rely on past acquaintanceship, however
brief, or to summon to his aid any of the social devices by which ardor
without limit, can be excused or palliated in the eyes of the world.
It was primitive, perhaps, but he had often imagined himself walking
between the huts of a South Sea Island village, seeing in a doorway
a brown native girl who set his pulses to pounding and wasting not a
second's time in gathering her into his arms and carrying her inside
the hut. The girl would have to be willing, of course, even eager. Even
in his most audacious dreams Loring was not a brute.
Making love that impetuously was certainly frowned upon by society,
even if a man wasn't a brute, and very difficult to achieve in reality,
because almost all women preferred the slower, more graceful and
romantic approach. The whispering of at least a few sweet nothings into
a woman's ear could work wonders and it helped to have known her for
at least ten or fifteen minutes.
In sober fact, Loring had never quite been able to reconcile himself
to an amatory pattern that was taken for granted in the Village. You
went to a party and met a girl you liked and slept with her the same
night. He liked to tell himself he couldn't be shocked and yet, almost
invariably, he was shocked. Some vestigial Puritan remnant deep in his
nature, perhaps. He was glad that it hadn't happened that way between
Janice and himself.
And yet, strangely enough, he experienced no such inhibiting emotional
reaction when he looked deep into the eyes of the woman standing
before him. He felt completely freed from all conventional restraints,
untouched by scruples of any kind. Her eyes both mocked and challenged
him, with an almost animal sensuality, as if even his few seconds of
hesitation were wholly inexcusable and were becoming intolerable in her
sight.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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