You no longer count (Tu n'es plus rien!) — John Shaqi
You no longer count (Tu n'es plus rien!)Boylesve, René
General
You no longer count (Tu n'es plus rien!)
Boylesve, René
World War, 1914-1918 -- Fiction
Odette, surprised, embarrassed, still under the influence of the life
she had been leading, spoke as every one did:
"There are so many of us who deserve to be pitied."
"No, Odette, no; I am not saying that. No doubt there are many widows
and many young women whose husbands or lovers are maimed, disfigured,
ruined. But there are not many who, before all that, have truly enjoyed
life and love. You have known love. You have had a few years that are
worth being regretted."
Tears rose to Odette's eyes. They were tears that gave no pain, which
rather comforted her. It seemed that she had long been waiting to shed
such tears. She had so constantly heard conventional words, forced
expressions, the result of a strained situation which there was surely
no reason to criticise; but, except from her wounded soldiers, she had
not before heard words simply human.
Clotilde was not afraid to talk persistently of Jean, not because she
felt that at bottom she was giving pleasure to her friend, but because
her thoughts naturally turned to attractive things, and she loved to
remember that charming couple of perfect lovers that Jean and Odette had
been. Never having checked her instinct, it now told her that Odette, in
spite of her tears, enjoyed the revival of these memories. It was not
Jean the soldier, Jean the hero, whose praises Clotilde sang. Odette had
heard so many praises of heroes! She had handled so many with her own
hands! There had never been but one Jean. He was Jean, just Jean, a
fine, good, and handsome fellow who had nothing military, nothing
surprising about him, except just that he was beloved. Who had dared to
talk to her of that Jean since the war? No one. Clotilde was doing it in
the unconsciousness of a woman who was still what she had been _before_.
And Odette had felt some apprehension about seeing Clotilde again, just
because she had feared that Clotilde had really not changed enough!
The interview was soothing, even delightful to her. Clotilde seemed
almost to have forgotten the war--a little more and she would have made
her forget it. She talked of the books that she was reading; books
written earlier than the present time; she talked, too, laughingly of
her clothes, on the pretext of the diminished resources of the family;
she spoke of certain middle-aged and even old men, saying that they had
not been appreciated in the days when there had been plenty of young
fellows. She offered her friend a cigarette; she smoked, and the two
women looked at each other through curls of long, light clouds, as if in
a dream.
Odette went out somewhat amazed at the incredible ivory tower which
Clotilde had succeeded in building around her youth, her beauty, and her
selfishness.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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