You no longer count (Tu n'es plus rien!)Boylesve, René
General
You no longer count (Tu n'es plus rien!)
Boylesve, René
World War, 1914-1918 -- Fiction
Odette smiled, not only at the thought of what people were thinking of
her, but at the solicitude which they expressed for her, and that sort
of obsession for heroic acts which every one seemed to cherish. Odette
had not the slightest intention of performing a heroic act. Nothing in
her character had ever inclined her in that direction. Her heart was
made for loving. She loved, she was sure that she loved. The one whom
she loved was her husband--her Jean. She could ill analyze the character
of the tenderness which at the same time she felt for every suffering
creature on earth. And that was all. What would they have of her?
XXXVI
Nevertheless she continued to be disturbed by the strange rumor which
had been set afloat, which was still afloat, and she promised herself to
speak about it to Clotilde, who without doubt had been the cause of its
diffusion.
On drawing near to the house in which Clotilde lived, she met Lieutenant
Avvogade guiding his blinded man by the arm. She had not so much as
thought of avoiding such an encounter.
When the blind man recognized Odette's voice his whole face was
transfigured. He turned pale; he hardly had courage to speak. But she
felt the effort with which his closed eyelids were directed toward the
point in space from which her voice had come; her perfume had been
wafted to him. This blinded man was looking at her, was seeing her in
his imagination; perhaps he was seeing her much more beautiful, more
alluring, than he had dreamed! He had been disturbed because
opportunities to be with her had no longer been afforded him, and he did
not know that it was not she herself who had prevented them. But an
inward instinct, stronger than he had yet known, filled him with ecstasy
in that moment of the young woman's presence. He inhaled her like a
flower, he listened to her, was saturated with her. Believing himself to
be behind the veil which hid the daylight from him, as behind a screen,
he neglected to keep a watch on himself, to impose constraint upon
himself. His emotion was evident to those who saw him, and the agitation
of a man so much to be pitied impressed her profoundly.
Odette told him that she had learned that he had two little children.
Then the blinded man extended his hand to her; his throat contracted; he
could not utter a word. Without hesitation Odette took the hand of this
man, so good-hearted and so wretched, and let her own be enfolded in
his. Not a word had been added to those alluding to the children, yet
she felt that she had never heard from human lips such an expression of
gratitude.
*
* *
They were there, under the trees of the Square of the United States, one
of the beauty spots of opulent, worldly Paris, where so many
conventional words and actions must have been exchanged; and this
agitated silence, those clasped hands, result of the universal woe,
seemed to embody as in marble the symbol of a new beauty which effaced
all that had before been known.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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