The child’s mind, so suggestible to facts, seems to be almost
impervious to what we call spiritual influences. He lives in a world
hermetically sealed to our interests and concerns. Parents and teachers
make the most conscientious efforts to influence their children, but
they would better realize that they can influence them only in the
most indirect way. The best thing they can do for the children is to
feed their curiosity, and provide them with all the materials that will
stimulate their varied interests. They can then leave the “influence”
to take care of itself. The natural child seems to be impregnable to
any appeals of shame, honor, reverence, honesty, and even ridicule,--in
other words, to all those methods we have devised for getting a
clutch on other people’s souls, and influencing and controlling
them according to our desires. And this is not because the child is
immoral, but simply because, as I have tried to show, those social
values mean as yet nothing to him. He lives in a splendid isolation
from our conventional standards; the influences of his elders, however
well-directed and prayerful they may be, simply do not reach him. He
lives unconscious of our interests and motives. Only the “good” child
is susceptible, and he is either instinctively submissive, or is the
victim of the mechanical imposition of standards and moral ideas.
The child works out what little social morality he does obtain, not
under the influence of his elders, but among his playmates. And the
standards worked out there are not refined and moral at all, but
rough ones of emulation and group honor, and respect for prowess. Even
obedience, which we all like to think of as one of the indispensable
accomplishments of a well-trained child, seems to be obtained at the
cost of real moral growth. It might be more beneficial if it were not
too often merely a means for the spiritual edification of the parents
themselves. Too often it is the delight of ruling, of being made
obeisance to, that is the secret motive of imposing strict obedience,
and not our desire simply that they shall learn the excellent habits
that are our own. One difficulty with the child who has “learned to
mind” is that, if he learns too successfully, he runs the risk of
growing up to be a cowardly and servile youth. There is a theory that
since the child will be obliged in later life to do many things that
he does not want to do, he might as well learn how while he is young.
The difficulty here seems to be that learning to do one kind of a
thing that you do not want to do does not guarantee your readiness to
do other kinds of unpleasant things. That art cannot be taught. Each
situation of compulsion, unless the spirit is completely broken, will
have its own peculiar quality of bitterness, and no guarantee against
it can be inculcated. Life will present so many inevitable necessities
to the child when he gets out into the world that it seems premature to
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