Once more: all people value most what has cost them much labour in the
production; for instance, people who have themselves made their money
are fonder of it than those who have inherited it: and receiving
kindness is, it seems, unlaborious, but doing it is laborious. And this
is the reason why the female parents are most fond of their offspring;
for their part in producing them is attended with most labour, and they
know more certainly that they are theirs. This feeling would seem also
to belong to benefactors.
Chapter VIII.
A question is also raised as to whether it is right to love one’s Self
best, or some one else: because men find fault with those who love
themselves best, and call them in a disparaging way lovers of Self; and
the bad man is thought to do everything he does for his own sake
merely, and the more so the more depraved he is; accordingly men
reproach him with never doing anything unselfish: whereas the good man
acts from a sense of honour (and the more so the better man he is), and
for his friend’s sake, and is careless of his own interest.
But with these theories facts are at variance, and not unnaturally: for
it is commonly said also that a man is to love most him who is most his
friend, and he is most a friend who wishes good to him to whom he
wishes it for that man’s sake even though no one knows. Now these
conditions, and in fact all the rest by which a friend is
characterised, belong specially to each individual in respect of his
Self: for we have said before that all the friendly feelings are
derived to others from those which have Self primarily for their
object. And all the current proverbs support this view; for instance,
“one soul,” “the goods of friends are common,” “equality is a tie of
Friendship,” “the knee is nearer than the shin.” For all these things
exist specially with reference to a man’s own Self: he is specially a
friend to himself and so he is bound to love himself the most.
It is with good reason questioned which of the two parties one should
follow, both having plausibility on their side. Perhaps then, in
respect of theories of this kind, the proper course is to distinguish
and define how far each is true, and in what way. If we could ascertain
the sense in which each uses the term “Self-loving,” this point might
be cleared up.
Well now, they who use it disparagingly give the name to those who, in
respect of wealth, and honours, and pleasures of the body, give to
themselves the larger share: because the mass of mankind grasp after
these and are earnest about them as being the best things; which is the
reason why they are matters of contention. They who are covetous in
regard to these gratify their lusts and passions in general, that is to
say the irrational part of their soul: now the mass of mankind are so
disposed, for which reason the appellation has taken its rise from that
mass which is low and bad. Of course they are justly reproached who are
Self-loving in this sense.