8th.--Up at ten. Felt ill--could eat no breakfast. Set to work at the part of the little picture of _Waiting_ which I set and began last night. Sunday began it. Slow work retouching all over, having scraped within a hair’s-breadth of its existence. Took a long walk at dusk; and in the evening placed the table-lamp etc., having changed the subject into one of an officer’s wife thinking of him at Sebastopol; a miniature effects this.... 9th.--Dispirited and heavy about the head--funds 4s.... 10th--Have been casting up my accounts. Find that in twenty weeks we have spent £66. 18s. and owe about £35 besides. The excess is chiefly in the house-money, about £15 (or 15s. per week): this is Emma’s bad management. In pleasure and all extras we have exceeded £2. 10s., or 2s. 6d. a week; this is our trip to St. Alban’s, I suppose. I allow about 5s. a week for these. How are we to go on Heaven only knows. Rossetti has been here six weeks, and Nurse two, besides the children and Woolner and William Rossetti.... 11th.--Made up my mind to make up a parcel of Emma’s shawl, some papier-maché ornaments, and two engravings after Claude, with the large _Shipwreck_ of Turner, to send by the carrier to old Williams to-morrow, for him to pledge, if we do not have a letter with Ritchie’s money before the carrier calls. Something must be done, as there is only 3s. 3d. in hand, and Emma about to be confined.... I am getting a regular Haydon at pawning. So long as I do not become one at cheating my creditors, it matters little. God help us. I see nothing but ruin by progressive stages. No work to-day.