Whosoever therefore would _assuage_ the anger of his _auditor_, must make himself appear such as men use to be _reconciled_ unto: and beget in his _auditor_ such opinions as make him _reconcileable_. ========== CHAPTER IV. OF LOVE AND FRIENDS. To _love_ is to will well to another, and that for others, not for our own sake. A _friend_ is he that _loves_, and he that is _beloved_. _Friends_ one to another, are they that naturally _love_ one another. A _friend_ therefore is he; that rejoiceth at another’s good. And that grieves at his hurt. And that wishes the same with us to a third, whether good or hurt. And that is _enemy_ or _friend_ to the same man. We _love_ them: that have done good to us, or ours; especially if much, readily, or in season. That are our friends' _friends_. That are our enemies' _enemies_. That are liberal. That are valiant. That are just. And that we would have love us. And good companions. And such as can abide jests. And such as break jests. And such as praise us, especially for somewhat that we doubt of in ourselves. And such as are neat. And such as upbraid us not with our vices, or with their own benefits. And such as quickly forget injuries. And such as least observe our errors. And such as are not of ill tongue. And those that are ignorant of our vices. And such as cross us not when we are busy or angry. And such as are officious towards us. And those that are like us. And such as follow the same course or trade of life, where they impeach not one another. And such as labour for the same thing, when both may be satisfied. And such as are not ashamed to tell us freely their faults, so it be not in contempt of us, and the faults such as the world, rather than their own consciences, condemns. And such as are ashamed to tell us of their very faults. And such as we would have honour us, and not envy, but imitate us. And such as we would do good to, except with greater hurt to ourselves. And such as continue their friendship to the dead. And such as speak their mind. And such as are not terrible. And such as we may rely on. The several _kinds_ of _friendship_, are _society_, _familiarity_, _consanguinity_, _affinity_ _&c._ The things that _beget love_, are, the bestowing of benefits, _gratis_; _unasked_; _privately_. ========== CHAPTER V. OF ENMITY AND HATRED. The _colours_ or _common opinions_ concerning _hatred_, are to be taken from the _contrary_ of those which concern love and friendship.