He gazed at the drawn blinds of the deserted house in an agony of
hopelessness, craving the warm sympathy, the laughter, the dear human
companionship, the mere sound of his Christian name which he had not
heard uttered for over two years--ever since he had entered by that gate
above which the _lasciate ogni speranza_ seemed written in letters of
flame. The lines deepened on his face. The touch of a friendly hand,
a kind glance from familiar eyes, the daily, unnoted possession of
millions, were to him a priceless treasure, forever beyond his reach.
He was barely thirty. His life was wrecked. Nothing lay before him but
pariahdom, and slinking from the gaze of honest men. And within him
there burnt no fiery sense of injustice to keep alive the flame of noble
impulse--only self-contempt, ignominy, the ineffaceable brand of the
gaol.
It was on the pavement opposite that he had been arrested. He had
tripped down the steps in evening dress, his ears buzzing with the
laughter within, in spite of tremulous throbbings of his heart, and had
walked into the arms of the two quiet officers in plain clothes who had
been patiently awaiting his exit. From that moment onward his life
had been one pain and horror. Regained freedom had brought him little
joy--had brought him in fact increased despair. During the last few
months of his imprisonment he had yearned sickeningly for the day of
release. It had come. Sometimes he regretted the benumbed hours of that
mid-time in gaol, when pain had been lost in apathy. He had been free
for five months. In all probability he would be free for the rest of his
life. Sometimes he shuddered at the prospect.
The policeman again passed by, and this time eyed him askance. Why was
he sitting on those steps? A suspicion of felonious purpose relieved the
monotony of his beat.
“You ’ll be moving on soon,” he said. “You mustn’t doss on them doorsteps
all day.”
The man looked at him rather stupidly. His first impulse was one of
servile obedience--an instinct of late habit, and he rose from
his seat. Then his sense of independence asserted itself, and
he said, in a somewhat defiant tone:--
“I felt faint from the heat. You have no right to molest me.”
The policeman glanced at him from head to foot. A gentleman evidently,
in spite of well-worn clothes and gloveless hands thrust into trousers
pockets. He wore no watch-chain, and his shirt-cuffs were destitute of
links. “Down upon his luck,” thought the policeman; “ill too.” The man’s
face was pinched, and of the transparent white of a thin, fair man with
delicately cut features. His eyes were heavy, deeply sunken, and wore an
expression of weariness mingled with fear. The side muscles by his mouth
were relaxed, as if a heavy drooping moustache had dragged them
down; the scanty blonde hair on his upper lip, curled up at the ends,
contrasted oddly with this impression. He looked careworn and ill. His
clothes hung loosely upon him. The policeman surrendered his point.