"Swingin round the cirkle" : $b His ideas of men, politics, and things, as set forth in his letters to the public press, during the year 1866. — John Locke — John Shaqi
"Swingin round the cirkle" : $b His ideas of men, politics, and things, as set forth in his letters to the public press, during the year 1866.
John Locke · en
General Breckinridge wuz the first that I saw enter the flood. He hed on
a life preserver, labelled "States Rights," but a peert little devil
stuck a pin into it, and it collapsed, the gas with wich it wuz filled
smellin horribly. Down he went, and ez he sunk, they commenced peltin
him with packages labelled "Treason," "Perjury," and "Murder," and John
C. went under.
Old James Buckanon went next. The old gentleman didn't keep above water
as long ez a able bodied man could hold a bar uv red hot iron in his
hand. He made one splash, when a weight labelled "Treason" struck him,
and down he went. The gentlemanly and urbane devil who had him in charge
had a big pile more uv ammunition to discharge at him, but that one wuz
sufficient.
Vallandigham come next. I wuz surprised to see no one make a motion at
him, but he sunk all the same. "We never waste effort," sed Satan to me;
"he carries enough natural cussedness about him, all the time, to sink
him, without pilin any devilment on his shoulders wich is ten days old."
Frank Peerce made his appearance, but declined to enter. He wuz
immediately seezed, and on each leg wuz tied a weight labelled "Kansas,"
and they flung him in. He went down like a shot, and that's the last I
seed uv him.
Garret Davis went in, and to my surprise, passed over safely. Nothin wuz
flung at him, for wich I asked the reason.
"Why," sed Satan, "the poor old man isn't accountable. He commenced to
talk many years ago, and keeps on talkin because he really don't know
when to stop. I could hev sunk him, but the fact is, I woodent endoor
what the Senit uv the Yoonited States hez hed to, for the past few
years, for a dozen uv Tombs lawyers. Besides this, I'm gettin more from
Kentucky now than I am really entitled to. I've a mortgage on two-thirds
uv that State."
Fernandy and Ben Wood come up rather bold, and entered the flood ez
though they were sure uv goin through all right. With a inimitable
chuckle, Satan motioned away the inexperienced devils, and sed, "Leave
em to me," and at Ben he hurled a package uv the New York News, wich
swashed him down instanter. Jest ez Fernandy wuz beginnin to reach the
other shore, he flung onto him an assortment uv weights, labelled
"Lotteries" and "Riots," which took him down to the arm pits, and
finished by tumblin onto him a mass, onto wich wuz written "Mayoralty,"
and down he went; at wich His Majesty drew a sigh uv relief.
Seein the style uv the men who sunk, I remarked unto him,--
"This war hez bin a rather profitable thing for you."