“What else in the world can I do? You know very well what happened to
me. My poor old father was just able to send me to Cambridge because I
had a good scholarship. When he died there was nothing to supplement the
scholarship which wasn’t enough to keep me at the University. I had to
go down. My mother had nothing but my father’s life insurance money—a
thousand pounds—and twenty pounds a year from the Freemasons. When she
wrote to her relations about her distress, what do you think my damned
set of Swiss uncles and aunts and cousins sent her? Two hundred francs!
Eight pounds! And they’re all rolling in money got out of the English. I
had to find work at once to support us both. My only equipment was a
knowledge of French. I got a post at Margett’s through a scholastic
agency. I thought it a miracle. When the letter came accepting my
application I didn’t sleep all night. I remained there till a week or so
ago, working twelve hours a day all the year round. I don’t say I had
classes for twelve hours,” he admitted, conscientiously, “but when you
see about a couple of hundred pupils a day and they all do written work
which needs correcting, you’ll find you have as much work in class as
out of class. Last night I dreamed I was confronted with a pile of
exercise books eight feet high.”
“It’s a dog’s life,” Corinna repeated.
“It is,” said Martin. “_Mais que veux-tu, ma pauvre Corinne._ I detest
it as much as one can detest anything. If even I was a successful
teacher—_passe encore_. But I doubt whether I have taught anybody even
the _régime du participe passé_ save as a mathematical formula. It’s
heart-rending. It has turned me into a brainless, soulless, heartless,
bloodless machine.”
For a moment or two the glamour of the Parisian meal faded away. He
beheld himself—as he had wofully done in intervals between the raptures
of the past few days—an anxious and despairing young man: terribly
anxious to obtain another abhorred teachership, yet desperate at the
prospect of lifelong, ineffectual drudgery. Corinna, her elbows on the
table, poising in her hand a teaspoonful of tepid strawberry ice,
regarded him earnestly.
“I wish I were a man,” she declared.
“What would you do?”
She swallowed the morsel of ice and dropped her spoon with a clatter.
“I would take life by the throat and choke something big out of it,” she
cried dramatically.
“Probably an ocean of tears or a Sahara of despair,” said a voice from
the door.