Eugenia, meanwhile, felt the placid composure of her mind now for the
first time shaken. The assiduities of this young man had already pleased
and interested her; but, though gratified by them in his presence, they
occurred to her no more in his absence. With the Oxonian she had been
far more struck; his energy, his sentiments, his passion for literature,
would instantly have riveted him in her fairest favour, had she not so
completely regarded herself as the wife of Clermont Lynmere, that she
denied her imagination any power over her reason.
This letter, however, filled her with sensations wholly new. She now
first reflected seriously upon the nature of her situation with regard
to Clermont, for whom she seemed bespoken by her uncle, without the
smallest knowledge how they might approve or suit each other. Perhaps he
might dislike her; she must then have the mortification of being
refused: perhaps he might excite her own antipathy; she must then either
disappoint her uncle, or become a miserable sacrifice.
Here, on the contrary, she conceived herself an elected object. The
difference of being accepted, or being chosen, worked forcibly upon her
mind; and, all that was delicate, feminine, or dignified in her notions,
rose in favour of him who sought, when opposed to him who could only
consent to receive her. Generous, too, he appeared to her, in forbearing
to apply to Sir Hugh, without her permission; disinterested, in
declaring he did not wish for her hand without her heart; and noble, in
not seeking her in a clandestine manner, but referring every thing to
Miss Margland.
The idea also of exciting an ardent passion, lost none of its force from
its novelty to her expectations. It was not that she had hitherto
supposed it impossible; she had done less; she had not thought of it
all. Nor came it now with any triumph to her modest and unassuming mind;
all it brought with it was gratitude towards Bellamy, and a something
soothing towards herself, which, though inexplicable to her reason, was
irresistible to her feelings.
When Camilla entered with the letter, she bashfully asked her, if she
wished to read it? Camilla eagerly cried: 'O, yes.' But, having finished
it, said: 'It is not such a letter as Edgar Mandlebert would have
written.'
'I am sure, then,' said Eugenia, colouring, 'I am sorry to have received
it.'
'Do you not observe every day,' said Camilla, 'the distance, the
delicacy of his behaviour to Indiana, though Miss Margland says their
marriage is fixed; how free from all distinction that might confuse her?
This declaration, on the contrary, is so abrupt--and from so new an
acquaintance--'
'Certainly, then, I won't answer it,' said Eugenia, much discomposed;
'it had not struck me thus at first reading; but I see now all its
impropriety.'
She then bid good night to Camilla; who, concluding her the appropriated
wife of Clermont, had uttered her opinion without scruple.