30. A Country Clergyman meeting a Neighbour who never came to Church, altho' an old Fellow of above Sixty, he gave him some Reproof on that Account, and asked him if he never read at Home: No, replyed the Clown, I can't read; I dare say, said the Parson you don't know who made you; not I, in troth, said the Countryman. A little Boy coming by at the same Time, who made you, Child, cry'd the Parson, _God_, Sir, answered the Boy. Why look you there, quoth the honest Clergyman, are not you ashamed to hear a Child of five or six Years old tell me who made him, when you that are so old a Man can not: Ah, said the Countryman, it is no Wonder that he should remember, he was made but t'other Day, it is a great while, Master, sin I were made. 31. A certain reverend Drone in the Country was complaining to another, that it was a great Fatigue to preach twice a Day. Oh! said the other, I preach twice every _Sunday_, and _make nothing of it_. 32. One of the foresaid Gentlemen, as was his Custom, preaching most exceedingly dull to a Congregation not used to him, many of them slunk out of the Church one after another, before the Sermon was near ended. Truly, said a Gentleman present, this learned Doctor has made a very _moving_ Discourse. 33. Sir _William Davenant_, the Poet, had _no Nose_, who going along the Meuse one Day, a Beggar-Woman followed him, crying, ah! God preserve your _Eye-Sight_; Sir, the Lord preserve your _Eye-Sight_. Why, good Woman, said he, do you pray so much for my _Eye-Sight_? Ah! dear Sir, answered the Woman, if it should please God that you grow dim-sighted, you have no Place to hang your _Spectacles_ on. 34. A Welchman bragging of his Family, said, his Father's Effigies was set up in _Westminster-Abbey_, being ask'd whereabouts, he said in the same Monument with Squire _Thyne_'s for he was his Coachman. 35. A Person was saying, not at all to the Purpose, that really _Sampson_, was a very strong Man; Ay, said another, but you are much stronger, for you make nothing of lugging him by the Head and Shoulders. 36. My Lord _Strangford_, who stammered very much, was telling a certain Bishop that sat at his Table, that _Balaam_'s Ass spoke because he was Pri----est---- Priest-rid, Sir, said a Valet-de-Chambre, who stood behind his Chair, my Lord would say. No, Friend, reply'd the Bishop, _Balaam_ could not speak himself, and so his _Ass_ spoke for him. 37. The same noble Lord ask'd a Clergy-man once, at the Bottom of his Table, why the _Goose_, if there was one, was always plac'd next the _Parson_. Really, said he, I can give no Reason for it; but your Question is so odd, that I shall never see a _Goose_ for the future without thinking of your _Lordship_. 38. A Gentleman was asking another how that poor Devil _S----ge_ could live, now my Lord _T----l_ had turn'd him off. Upon his Wits said the other; _That is living upon a slender Stock indeed_, reply'd the First.