124. The late Commissary-General G―ley, who once kept a glass-shop, having Colonel P―c―k’s regiment under a muster, made great complaints of the men’s appearance, &c., and said that the regiment ought to be broke. Then, sir, said the Colonel, perhaps you think a regiment is as soon broke as a looking-glass. 125. Curll, the bookseller, being under examination at the bar of the House of Lords, for publishing the posthumous works of the late Duke of Buckingham, without leave of the family, told their Lordships in his defence, That if the duke was living, he was sure he would readily pardon the offence. 126. Mr. E―ll―s, the painter, having finished a very good picture of Figg, the prize-fighter, who had been famous in getting the better of several Irishmen of the same profession, the piece was shown to old Johnson the player, who was told at the same time, that Mr. E―ll―s designed to have a mezzotinto print taken from it, but wanted a motto to be put under it. Then, said old Johnson, I’ll give you one: A Fig for the Irish. 127. A gentleman coming to an inn in Smithfield, and seeing the ostler expert and tractable about the horses, asked how long he had lived there, and what countryman he was? I’se Yorkshire, said the fellow, and ha’ lived sixteen years here. I wonder, replied the gentleman, that, in so long a time, so clever a fellow as you seem to be, have not come to be master of the inn yourself. Ay, answered the ostler, but maister’s Yorkshire too. 128. The late Colonel Chartres, reflecting on his ill life and character, told a certain nobleman, that if such a thing as a good name was to be purchased, he would freely give 10,000_l._ for one. The nobleman said, it would certainly be the worst money he ever laid out in his life. Why so? said the honest Colonel. Because, answered the lord, you would forfeit it again in less than a week. 129. A seedy, poor, half-pay captain, who was much given to blabbing everything he heard, was told, There was but one secret in the world he could keep, and that was, where he lodged. 130. Jack M―n going one day into the apartments in St. James’s, found a lady of his acquaintance sitting in one of the windows, who very courteously asked him to sit down by her, telling him there was a place. No, madam, said he, I do not come to court for a place. If the gentle reader should have a desire to repeat this story, let him not make the same blunder that a certain English-Irish foolish lord did, who made the lady ask Jack to sit down by her, telling him there was room.