Life in the Iron-Mills; Or, The Korl Woman — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
Life in the Iron-Mills; Or, The Korl Woman
John Stuart Mill · en
Then flashed before his vivid poetic sense the man who had left
him,--the pure face, the delicate, sinewy limbs, in harmony with all he
knew of beauty or truth. In his cloudy fancy he had pictured a Something
like this. He had found it in this Mitchell, even when he idly
scoffed at his pain: a Man all-knowing, all-seeing, crowned by Nature,
reigning,--the keen glance of his eye falling like a sceptre on other
men. And yet his instinct taught him that he too--He! He looked at
himself with sudden loathing, sick, wrung his hands With a cry, and then
was silent. With all the phantoms of his heated, ignorant fancy, Wolfe
had not been vague in his ambitions. They were practical, slowly built
up before him out of his knowledge of what he could do. Through years
he had day by day made this hope a real thing to himself,--a clear,
projected figure of himself, as he might become.
Able to speak, to know what was best, to raise these men and women
working at his side up with him: sometimes he forgot this defined hope
in the frantic anguish to escape, only to escape,--out of the wet, the
pain, the ashes, somewhere, anywhere,--only for one moment of free air
on a hill-side, to lie down and let his sick soul throb itself out in
the sunshine. But to-night he panted for life. The savage strength of
his nature was roused; his cry was fierce to God for justice.
“Look at me!” he said to Deborah, with a low, bitter laugh, striking his
puny chest savagely. “What am I worth, Deb? Is it my fault that I am no
better? My fault? My fault?”
He stopped, stung with a sudden remorse, seeing her hunchback shape
writhing with sobs. For Deborah was crying thankless tears, according to
the fashion of women.
“God forgi' me, woman! Things go harder Wi' you nor me. It's a worse
share.”
He got up and helped her to rise; and they went doggedly down the muddy
street, side by side.
“It's all wrong,” he muttered, slowly,--“all wrong! I dunnot understan'.
But it'll end some day.”
“Come home, Hugh!” she said, coaxingly; for he had stopped, looking
around bewildered.
“Home,--and back to the mill!” He went on saying this over to himself,
as if he would mutter down every pain in this dull despair.