Miriam came to dinner silently raging; invisible, yet compelled to be
seen. Reduced to nonentity by his wrongly directed awareness, his
everlasting demand for bright fussy intelligence. It was her own fault.
The result of having been beguiled by joy into a pretence of conformity.
For the rest of the visit she would be roughly herself. To shreds she
would tear his twofold vision of women as bright intelligent response or
complacently smiling audience. Force him to see the evil in women who
made terms with men, the poison there was in the trivial gaiety of those
who accepted male definitions of life and the world. Somehow make him
aware of the reality that fell, all the time, in the surrounding
silence, outside his shapes and classifications.
Sunk away into separation, she found herself gliding into communion with
surrounding things, shapes gleaming in the twilight, the intense
thrilling beauty of the deep, lessening colours.... She passed into
association with them, feeling him fade, annihilated, while her eased
breathing released the strain of battle. He was spending the seconds of
silence that to him were a void, in observation, misinterpretations. The
air was full of his momentary patience. She turned smiling and caught
his smile halting between amused contemplation of vacuity and despairing
sympathy with boredom. He had not heard the shouts of repudiation with
which she had plunged down into her silence. He dropped her and let his
testing eye, which he knew she followed, rest on Alma. Two vacuities ...
watched by empty primitive eyes, savage eyes, under shaggy brows,
staring speculatively out through a forest of eyelash. Having thus made
his statement and caught Alma's attention he made a little drama of
childish appeal, with plaintive brows, pleading for rescue.
"Let's have some light. We're almost in darkness," said Alma.
"We are, we are," he wailed, and Miriam caught his eyes flashed upon her
to collect her acceptance of his judgment. The central light Alma had
risen to switch on, flashed up over the silk-clad firm little column of
her body winged on either side by the falling drapery of her extended
arms, and revealed as she sat down the triangle of pendant-weighted
necklace on her white throat, the soft squareness of her face, peaked
below by the delicate sharp chin and above by her piled gold hair. The
day had gone; quenched in the decoration of the night set there by Alma,
like the first scene of a play into whose speech and movement she was,
with untroubled impersonal bearing, already steadily launched, conscious
of the audience, untroubled by their anticipation.
"It's _awful_. The evenings are already getting short," cried Miriam,
her voice thrilling in conversation with the outer living spaces beyond
the shut-in play. His swiftly flashed glance lingered a moment;
incredulous of her mental wandering? In stupefaction that was almost
interest, over her persistence, after diagnosis, in anachronism, in
utter banality?