The Attack on the Mill, and Other Sketches of War — John Stuart Mill — John Shaqi
The Attack on the Mill, and Other Sketches of War
John Stuart Mill · en
Among the most distinguished in these conflicts was a tall, fair lad,
who always got chosen General. Louis, who belonged to an old Breton
family that had come to live in the South, assumed victorious airs. I
can see him yet, with a handkerchief tied on his forehead by way of
plume, a leather belt girded round him, leading on his soldiers with
a wave of the hand as if it were the great wave of a sword. He filled
us with admiration; we even felt a sort of respect for him. Strangely
enough he had a twin-brother, Julien, who was much smaller, frail
and delicate, and who greatly disliked these violent games. When we
divided into two camps, he would go apart, sit down on a stone bench,
and thence watch us with his sad and rather frightened eyes. One day,
Louis, hustled and attacked by a whole band, fell under their blows,
and Julien gave a cry, pallid, trembling, half-fainting like a woman.
The two brothers adored each other, and none of us would have dared to
laugh at the little one about his want of courage, for fear of the big
one.
The memory of these twins is closely involved for me in the memory of
that time. Towards the spring, I became a day-boarder, and no longer
slept at the college, but came in the morning for the seven o’clock
lessons. The two brothers, also, were day-boarders. The three of us
were inseparable. As we lived in the same street we used to wait to go
in to college together. Louis, who was very precocious and dreamed of
adventures, seduced us. We agreed to leave home at six, so as to have
a whole hour of freedom in which we could be men. For us “to be men”
meant to smoke cigars and to go and have drinks at a shabby wine-shop,
which Louis had discovered in an out-of-the-way street. The cigars and
the drinks made us frightfully ill; but, then, what an emotion it was
to step into the wine-shop, casting glances to right and left, and in
terror of being observed.
These fine doings occurred towards the close of the winter. I remember
there were mornings when the rain fell in torrents. We waded through,
and arrived drenched. After that, the mornings became mild and fair,
and then a mania took hold of us--that of going to see off the
soldiers. Aix is on the road to Marseilles. Regiments came into the
town by the road from Avignon, slept one night, and started off on
the morrow by the road to Marseilles. At that time, fresh troops,
especially cavalry and artillery, were being sent to the Crimea. Not
a week elapsed without troops passing. A local paper even announced
these movements beforehand, for the benefit of the inhabitants with
whom the men lodged. Only we did not read the paper, and we were much
concerned to know overnight whether there would be soldiers leaving in
the morning. As the departure occurred at five in the morning, we were
obliged to get up very early, often to no purpose.