"What is the matter with him?" she asked, her earnest eyes holding his,
questioning his, refusing, it occurred to him, to allow what he was
telling her to bias her ultimate judgment. She had accustomed herself
to ugly truths; she was not shocked or dismayed any longer, only anxious
to have her worst fears confirmed or disproved. She desired to hear the
whole truth, whatever it held of pain or humiliation. At least it could
hold no disillusion for her.
"He has had a stroke of paralysis, they tell me," Dare answered,
avoiding her eyes.
He was conscious of a sudden movement on her part, of a quick, inaudible
exclamation which was followed by a sharp indrawing of her breath. He
did not look at her; he felt, without seeing them, that there were tears
of pity and of horror shining in her eyes. He counted for something to
her still. She was sorry for the man. Dare felt unreasonably incensed.
"There is hope of a partial recovery," he continued dully, trying to
keep under the sudden sharp jealousy that gripped him as nothing he had
experienced in all their former talks had gripped and hurt. "He'll get
about again, they think... walk a little. His brain is affected--
slightly. That will never be quite clear again..."
He broke off abruptly, and turned to her in protesting surprise. She
was weeping. The tears were welling in her eyes and coursing down her
cheeks. Arnott ill--broken--touched the deepest springs of her
compassion. All the bitterness in her heart against the man who had so
cruelly wronged her melted into sorrow for him in his terrible
affliction. She no longer experienced any anger against him, only a
great pity,--pity for the miserable wreckage of his health, which stood,
it seemed to her, as a symbol of the wreckage of their love,--all the
promise and the strength and the beauty gone for evermore,--only the
dead ashes remaining in the furnace of life.
"Your tears are a big return for his cruelty to you," he said, trying
with ill success to hide the twinge of jealousy which caused him to
wince at sight of her grief. "Some people might consider his condition
a perfectly just retribution. You owe him nothing--not even pity."
"One doesn't only render what is due," she said, wiping her eyes slowly.
"That would make life too hard. Could you expect me to hear unmoved
what you have just told me? I thought I had schooled myself to bear
anything; but this is too awful. I would rather have heard that he was
well and happy--with her."
"She is going to him," he said, bluntly.
"Going to him? ... Now?" Pamela's tone expressed wonder. "You mean,
she loves him sufficiently to marry him--ill--like that?"
"I mean," he returned, watching her narrowly, "that she loves herself
sufficiently to put up with his condition on account of his wealth. She
admitted that almost in as many words. It's as much as he has any right
to expect."
"Oh! no," she said quickly. "He is giving her more than that."