She passed out, and the man, rising also and looking after her, stood
with a heavy frown darkening his face, his shaking hand pulling
nervously at his moustache. The blow which he had so long dreaded had
fallen like a thunderbolt and threatened to destroy his home. He could
not feel sure how Pamela would act now that she knew the truth. Of her
love for him he had no shadow of a doubt; but women like Pamela
possessed scruples, queer principles of honour which hardened into
obstinacy when the question of right manifested itself beyond all
argument. When a thing became a matter of conscience with such women,
it was all a toss up, he reflected, whether the woman will not
deliberately sacrifice herself to her sense of equity. That as a
general rule on smaller matters she is less sensitive in regard to
points of honour, inclines her in moments of a serious decision to a
greater severity. For the life of him he could not determine what
Pamela would decide to do after reflection. The fact that she had
insisted on thinking the thing out alone occurred to him as the first
step in a moral victory which might spell disaster to the happiness of
both.
CHAPTER FIVE.
Pamela spent the day locked in her room. She held no communication with
any one. Arnott had no means of discovering how she was passing the
time, because on the one occasion when he pleaded for admission she
refused to open her door; and he went away troubled and sorely
dissatisfied.
He left the house and did not return until evening.
When she saw him go Pamela had a mad impulse to seize the opportunity
and escape from him, but she dismissed this idea almost immediately. To
run away would be ridiculous: she was quite free to go at any time. And
there was the child. The child was her child; it did not belong to its
father. That was the one right of the unmarried mother. The child of
the dishonoured union belongs as nature intended to the mother. Pamela
began dimly to understand why Herbert had so hated the thought of having
children; that at least was a point which counted in his favour.